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#1 Edited by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

I won round 14, let's kick off with round 15!

**

In preparation for the 50th anniversary of the international hero known as G.I Joe, you have been asked to create a Joe. Larry Hama* one of the premiere writers of G.I Joe has personally asked YOU to create a member of the Joe’s who will be turned into a limited edition action figure (imagine your character) --->

AND featured in the next film!

Larry has set some rules:

* NO COBRA! You are creating a G.I Joe, a hero. So no double agent or sleeper agents for the bad guys.

*NO RELATIONS! No sons of Snake Eyes or cousins of Duke or anything like that. It’s a new Joe without blood or marriage ties to any other Joe or Cobra. Even next door neighbours, foster kids, ex-lovers just in case. We need some new blood!

*NO KILLING ESTABLISHED CHARACTERS! Your guy or girl may be the best in their field, but putting a bullet into Cobra Commanders head for a first timer isn’t believable, practical or inventive. You can kill Cobra troops, Python patrols, B.A.T’s, Crimson Guards etc to your hearts content. Wounding, arm breaking, knocking out of established characters is fine but killing will get your entry ignored.

*NO SWEARING! Damn, heck, hell, bother, darnit etc are fine but since we want kids to buy this toy in droves no swearing, not even #%@! or $#!t.

There is no word limit on this, but remember if its too long, then people stop reading so average attention span runs 700-1300 words. Unless its good and people will follow you to the ends of the earth and beg for more. Use your own judgement on this.

Here is a link to G.I Joe on Wikipedia which may or may not help: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:G.I._Joe

Best of luck to you all. The contest will start on the 23rd August 2013 (Australian time) and run for eight days to get entries in, closing on the 31st at midnight then voting will commence. I urge you all to enter.

YO JOE!

*Larry Hama is actually being played by batkevin74 in this scenario, apologies to him and for the pretence...it is fan-fiction after all. Larry if you're reading, enter! :)

#2 Edited by dngn4774 (2770 posts) - - Show Bio

Meh... I'd lose this. I don't know anything about these characters, and knowing is half the battle.

#3 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@the_poet or @razzatazz when you get a chance can you set the CCC#14 voting thread free and pin this please, and enter as well.

Contest open to all, including you! :)

#4 Edited by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio
#5 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Go Jo....sh! :)

@dngn4774: Only one way to find that bold outrageous claim out, enter! All I know is from what I remember from the 80's cartoon, the movie, the rest (like most of my stuff) I make up! How do you know that your character eg: Pedro Gonzales aka Badgerito, escape specialist from the Mexican Special Forces isn't something that people go, i'd buy that. Don't sell your self short!

#6 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: Does he have to specialize in something that no other GI Joe Specializes in because that could be difficult since they have specialists for everything other than army barber.

#7 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Just going off a G.I Joe packet (see pic)

They often do specialize but it is your character, asides from the 4 rules everything goes :)

#8 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: K, I'll figure something out, I assume there's an implied no super powers rule.

#9 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Yeah, they're all elite but no, no super powers...guys & girls with guns, mad ninja skills, some high tech stuff, possibly some chemical enchancements but overall they're human

#10 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: Can they be former bad guys, like say a guy started out as a run of the mill cobra trooper and felt bad about it and became a Joe as a means of making up for his past? I'm not talking about giving Destro a faceturn, just one of the nameless minions trying to make good.

#11 Edited by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

Yo, Joe! I'll give it a go!

#12 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Former bad guy yes, former Cobra no! Maybe he/she was a biker or in Al-Quaeda or a Basque Seperatist or an enforcer for the triads but no Cobra

#13 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@cbishop: hey bro, good to know! You'll do okay in G I Joe!

#14 Edited by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: I really need a small "thumbs up" for some things here. :)

#15 Edited by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio
#16 Edited by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Former bad guy yes, former Cobra no! Maybe he/she was a biker or in Al-Quaeda or a Basque Seperatist or an enforcer for the triads but no Cobra

Enforcer for the Triads? @impurestcheese: Siwang as a G.I. Joe? :D

#17 Posted by ImpurestCheese (4654 posts) - - Show Bio
#18 Posted by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio
#19 Posted by TommytheHitman (2892 posts) - - Show Bio

G.I JOEEEE!!!! G.I JOEEEE IS THEREEEE!!!

#20 Edited by TheManInTheShoe (3876 posts) - - Show Bio

this would be awesome (if it was real) but I know nothing about GI Joe so I won't enter.

#21 Posted by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio

I know nothing of this guy. So can't enter. Good luck to others though.

#22 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: @themanintheshoe: Of course you know nothing about YOUR G.I Joe, you haven't invented him! I knew very little about Napoleon yet 15mins on Wikipedia reading I came up with a story and won the previous contest. I think you're selling yourselves short!

And pyrogram really, this has character creation written all over it!

Regardless the choice is yours, c'est la vie!

#23 Edited by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: I never said this don't have character creation, I mean I've got no concept of GI Joe lol

#24 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio
#25 Posted by Comiccrazeraze (427 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: Haha do we have to draw? Because if so I would be out before the contest started O.o

#26 Edited by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: Do we send you our posts or just post them here? I've never actually participated in the character creation contest before.

#27 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74

I am so annoyed at you! I thought my character could really be an action figure! Lol.

@pyrogram said:

I never said this don't have character creation, I mean I've got no concept of GI Joe lol

Get your butt in here.

#28 Posted by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio
#29 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@wildvine: Maybeeeeeeeee

Come om Mr super RPGer. Surely you can slap together a character from scratch. All you need is basic wiki knowledge of G.I. Joe.

#30 Posted by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine: As you asked so nicely I guess so. Okay Okay.

#31 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: Basically all you have to do is make a soldier who's really good at being a soldier and has a flashy nickname.

#32 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@wildvine: As you asked so nicely I guess so. Okay Okay.

Seriously Ferret. You got this funky junk in da bag.

#33 Posted by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio
#34 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio
#35 Edited by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio

@wildvine: Fine, I'll grow to love that name then :P

#36 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram said:

@wildvine: Fine, I'll grow to love that name then :P

Oh just kill my fun then. : P

#37 Edited by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio
#38 Edited by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

@batkevin74: Haha do we have to draw? Because if so I would be out before the contest started O.o

Nope, you just have to write.

@batkevin74: Do we send you our posts or just post them here? I've never actually participated in the character creation contest before.

Just post them here. They'll get collected together for the voting thread.

I know you guys asked batkev', but I was here and actually knew the answers. :)

#39 Posted by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

And just so everyone can get it out of their systems (or more into it)...

#40 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

Had to scrap my first idea for being total crap, I'll keep working on it.

#41 Edited by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@joshmightbe: Nothing wrong with your Tahitian stripper idea, just needs some polishing is all :)

@cbishop: Thanks for being me :)

@comiccrazeraze: God no! Otherwise I'm also out. Just write the story, maybe we'll convince an artist from the Artist Showoff section to draw the winner (no promises)

@pyrogram: The newest Joe "Ferret"! Heavy weapons & digging expert :)

@wildvine: That's the sign of an excellent set up, if i can make you believe that I was Larry Hama :)

#42 Posted by Pyrogram (35139 posts) - - Show Bio
#43 Posted by wildvine (8382 posts) - - Show Bio

@pyrogram: The newest Joe "Ferret"! Heavy weapons & digging expert :)

It writes itself!!

#44 Posted by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio
#45 Posted by joshmightbe (24653 posts) - - Show Bio

I'll get back to work on my story, I was distracted by being disgusted by the spoiled nature of younger comic fans. I know I sound like an old crank but damn it the kids are pissing me off with the whining. Micro rant over I'll get back to work.

#46 Posted by ImpurestCheese (4654 posts) - - Show Bio

Okay let's get the show on the road JOE. Hope everyone enjoys reading this and the other entries to come.

Black Box by Impurest Cheese

Macau Dragon Casino, Macau

The two identical well built oriental men in suits cracked their knuckles before one of the enforcers punched the bound blonde woman dressed in an orange tank top and kaki trousers complete with a matching hunting jacket in the face to even up the already black eyes with a broken nose. Bound to the chair the woman grunted and screamed in pain at the impact before hanging her head in a sign of exhaustion and apparent defeat.

"Look at me." A Portuguese accented voice ordered, "Look at me JOE." The woman kept staring at the floor so the voice asked again. "Look at me Valkyrie." The woman looked up to see an oriental man with a lean, hard edged face, the left cheek baring a slithering snarling moray eel wrapped around the Mandarin Chinese character 'Siwang', a potent symbol that backed the man's nasty attitude and aggressive features. "Do you think I'm an idiot Valkyrie?" The man asked, "You come into the Dragon Eel's Casino and blatantly blurt out your codename on a phone. Our cell snipers can track and decrypt the coded messages Beijing sends to the local government, your phone was like breaking into a child's puzzle box, an easy task for my network and that of our COBRA clients.

"Begynn opptak." The woman cried in Norwegian before the Dragon Eel slapped her round the face, the blow causing her to scream in pain.

"Speak in a language that is spoken here." The Dragon Eel commanded, "Mandarin, Cantonese, Portuguese, Malay even English I don't care which you chose but speak."

"My name is Jena Johansson I work for Raido Computer Consulting; I just came to upgrade the casino's computers." Jena whimpered. The Dragon Eel smiled to reveal filed canine teeth before clicking his fingers to signal the heavies to continue beating his captive. "Why are you doing this?" She cried between blows to the chest and face.

"Because JOE, a COBRA agent Firefly recently stole sensitive data regarding current and future operations against several locations held around the world by their organization." The Dragon Eel hissed as the thugs stopped beating their captive and backed off. "They are having some trouble decoding some files and set a trap to lure an agent here in the hopes that you will cooperate with their project."

"I can't break your codes." Jena replied through gasps. "My name isn't Jo and the Valkyrie thing is just an in company joke."

"Enough lies my men saw and heard you." The Dragon Eel announced angrily, getting to his feet and slamming the table with both hands. "Now tell me what is the unlock code for the files marked Black Box?"

"I don't know." Jena answered before a knock on the door sounded and one of the thugs went to open it. As he did a man clad in amber ballistic armour decorated with black spider webs stepped inside carrying a black briefcase and an MP7 Machine Pistol, the later being placed on the table in front of Jena, the mere sight of the weapon causing her to panic even more frantically then she had.

"Ah Weaver I trust the data is secure in COBRA's Stealth Ship just outside of Chinese Waters?" The Dragon Eel asked the new arrival.

"Delivered it myself." Weaver answered, "The thing is shielded against radar, can encrypt outgoing transmissions and has enough ordinance to level Macau. Factor in the brigade of elite troops and the remote sentry turrets Bocanegra sent over from the US and any JOE going in is not coming back out."

"Good, I have another matter to attend to." The Dragon Eel hissed, "All I need you to do is to break this JOE grunt and get the access code. When she's talked dispose of her and burn all of her effects. Use the apartment block the Five Houses bought for redevelopment, I will smooth over the damage with the other heads of the families."

"Anything you need help with?" Weaver asked.

"No one of my escorts was caught selling her daughter to an American man called Grady. Their family owes me a debt and she and her little girl were good money earners but alas they have outlived their usefulness." The Dragon Eel announced as he left the room. Weaver turned to look at Jena and flipped open the case to reveal an array of knives and other sharpened metal object. Fishing through the case Weaver brought out a gold mask featuring a horrifying face surrounded by tentacles and showed it to Jena.

"What do you think?" He asked her, "I got this from some Peruvian art dealer. He claims it was cursed with a Moche death hex that would release the Sea God. Personally I think the guy was looking for a better sale so I killed him, but first I did to him what I am going to do to you." He added pulling out a plastic tub with a ventilated lid that wobbled ominously as the animal inside moved around. Reaching in he pulled out a twenty centimetre long orange and black centipede, the oversized invertebrate aggressively trying to coil round his hand. "I also picked this up." Weaver announced, "The venom causes extreme pain in humans. The particular species of Scolopede is aggressive and nervous and will bite on the slightest hint of danger. As soon as you tell me what I need to know then I will release her from your arm and you from your pain. Do we have an accord?"

Jena nodded and braced herself for the coming pain that Weaver had promised. In his office the Dragon Eel watched as a nerdy Japanese man tapped the copies of the files they had removed from Jena's computer. "Takamoto do we have anything on Black Box files yet?" The Dragon Eel asked as he took a quick puff on the cigarette he was smoking.

"Not yet sir." Takamoto answered, "But I found Raido Computer Consultancy and checked their employee files. There is a Jena Johansson working for them and it appears the female staff members consider themselves techno Valkaries as some kind of in joke since Raido is the Norse Rune for the future. Wait we're in." He added excitedly as a video popped up on screen with a cat flying through the sky leaving a rainbow contrail behind it.

"What is this?" The Dragon Eel asked angrily.

"Nyan Cat." Takamoto answered, "Wait there's more." he gulped as letters flew up one by one to read the following; BLACK BOX TROJAN ACTIVATED. FILE TRANSFER COMPLETE. DELETING STORED MEMORY AND REMOTE HARDRIVE DATA.

"Black Box isn't a file it's a person." The Dragon Eel roared before turning to the security monitors only to see hissing static. With a roar of anger he left the room and ran down the stairs cursing angrily in the local Macau dialect and pushing unfortunate employees away before reaching the back room. Cautiously he opened the door to see his two enforcers dead the bullet wounds in their chests causing artistic smears across the wall while Weaver laid face up on the floor, the bullet holes in his visor currently filled by a massive centipede attempting to squirm inside his helmet. "Find her." The Dragon Eel yelled. "Bring me her head."

________________________________________________________________________________

Jena staggered outside of the Macau Dragon Casino past the guards. She knew they had seen people in worse states emerge, usually cheating gamblers and battered prostitutes, so they did nothing to stop her. After clearing a block she removed her right shoe, swivelled the heel open and removed a disposable mobile phone. After a few seconds the device chimed and she accepted the call.

"Duke it's Black Box. Did the data transmit?" Jena asked.

"Got it loud and clear." The man on the other end of the line answered. "We are down at the docks working on the guidance system to the Patrol Boat Weaver was using thanks to the data the Trojan recovered."

"Good, I also managed to recover a stolen Pre Columbian Face Plate." Jena added removing the Moche mask from under her jacket. I'm sure somebody is looking for it."

"Good Work." The second agent told her. "Head back to regional control and we'll go pay Firefly a visit. That git won't escape this time."

"Go JOE." Jena answered before turning the phone off and looking out to the harbour before throwing the mobile onto the street to the mercy of the traffic and sticking her hand out to hail a cab.

________________________________________________________________________________

Images are From;

1 (Moche Mask) - http://www.peruviantimes.com/04/history-of-peru-series-part-9-metallurgy-jewelry-and-gold/12114/

2 (Scolopede) - www.arkive.org

#47 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

@impurestcheese: And we're away! And tied into your previous story, clever person!

#48 Posted by cbishop (7105 posts) - - Show Bio

@impurestcheese: Ha! Managed to fit "Siwang" in there after all...sort of. ;) Excellent story!

#49 Edited by ImpurestCheese (4654 posts) - - Show Bio

@cbishop: @batkevin74: Thanks both of you and yes there are plenty of Patron Saint of Crime and even Legacy of Apaec references. Hopefully they are not to distracting.

#50 Posted by batkevin74 (10416 posts) - - Show Bio

I picked this and I'm struggling....6 days to engage brain

@the_poet and/or @razzatazz could you pin this please and maybe set free/unpin voting #14 if it's still up there. Thank you