<satisfied sigh> It's been a long break, folks, but I'm back and loving it. 1,462 words - hope you enjoy it.
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As the stormtrooper joined Fett at the edge of the dropoff, looking below, Fett said, “That is why there will never be a jedi wookie. Let’s go.”
“Noted, sir,” answered the stormtrooper.
Fett shook his head as he retrieved his blaster. He hated stormtroopers. They were just like his father, minus free will, appreciable skill, and anything resembling a personality. He checked the charge on his weapon, holstered it, and started towards the trooper’s speederbike. Why waste the jetpack, when he could catch a ride back to the ship?
He was about to mount the back of the bike, when something thumped the ground behind him. He snapped his head around quickly, only to find a wet tree branch lying near his feet. Then he heard the low growl of the wookie, and looked up to see him floating towards him, from the edge of the cliff. “Jedi hell! How many times do I have to kill you?”
Fett grabbed for his blaster, but stopped short when he heard the charger whine of a blaster from off to the side. “I really wish you wouldn’t do that,” said a voice from the trees.
“Fine, I won’t do that,” answered Fett, turning towards the trees, his hands out to his sides. He jerked his hand up suddenly, and fired off a shot from his wrist laser. There was a hum as a lightsaber came to life in the shadow of the trees, and deflected the blast. The stormtrooper chose that moment to take his shot, but missed and was downed by the voice’s blaster. Fett was reaching for his blaster pistol, when his hand froze, and he couldn’t move his arm. He then came off the ground, floating in midair, as the wookie growled loudly.
“Tubacca doesn’t like it when people shoot at me,” said the voice, revealed to be a young woman, as she stepped from the trees. “I don’t much care for it either.”
With some difficulty, Fett turned his helmeted head towards the wookie, and said, “And here I thought he was just mad because that branch got away from him.” The wookie let out a low snarl. “Or maybe it’s because he’s wet as a drowned bantha.” Tubacca snuffled gruffly. Fett sneered, not that anyone could see it through his helmet. “So who’re you, kid?”
“The name’s ’Tar Solo, and I’m the one who’s mad about the wookie being wet. Do you know how hard it’s going to be to get that smell out of my ship? Be glad you’re in that armor right now, is all I can tell you.” Tubacca stomped, letting out a short, indignant howl. ’Tar raised an eyebrow in her partner’s direction. “Oh, pipe down, furball. I bought you that combbot, didn’t I? A few towels and an hour with that, and you’ll be right in no time.” Something that might have been a purr came from the wookie.
“Heartwarming,” Fett offered snidely.
“Careful,” chided ’Tar. “Tubacca is angry about the tree branch. First rule of playing with a wookie: let the wookie win.”
“I hate to lose,” countered Fett. “Maybe you could scratch him behind the ear later.” Tubacca growled and used the Force to shake him violently. In doing so, he turned Fett to face him. As the bounty hunter flopped back-and-forth, he tightened one of his legs, and a couple of darts fired from his knee pad. One lodged in Tubacca’s bandolier, and the other knicked his ear, causing him to lose his concentration and drop Boba to the ground.
’Tar acted quickly, simultaneously Force sweeping Tubacca to one side, and Force shoving Boba Fett to the other side of the clearing. “Run, you ape! Into the trees!” Tubacca howled angrily, but followed immediately. They heard a couple of blaster shots as they got to the trees, and as they became concealed by the tree coverage, they heard Fett’s jetpack fire up. “Oh, brother, I hope you’ve got the ship running!” The wookie growled low as he ran. “Stop griping,” ’Tar called over her shoulder, “He’s not going to blame you!”
The bounty hunter’s jetpack whined overhead, and a few blasts from his disruptor rifle tore through the trees, coming nowhere near them. “He’s firing blind! Just get to the clearing! We’ll be covered from the ship!” Tubacca’s long legs had put him ahead of her now, and he reached the clearing first, but drew up short. ’Tar caught up quickly, and stopped only long enough to see Boba Fett dipping and diving in midair, furiously returning fire at the several weapons trained on him from the bronzed ship. She shoved the wookie and shouted, “Run! Go! Get to The Copper!” They bolted across the clearing and up the cargo ramp, a shot from Fett sizzling the air behind ’Tar as she scrambled into the ship. She returned fire, and slammed her fist on the button to close the cargo hold.
As ’Tar and Tubacca ran into the pilot cabin, a young man was at the comm, punching buttons furiously, and glancing over his shoulder only long enough to yell, “What has that damned wookie gotten us into now?” Tubacca whined in protest.
“Just get us the hell out of here, Drom!” ’Tar shouted at her brother. “Better yet, let the wookie drive!”
“Forget it! I’m already in the seat, and he smells like a wet bantha!” Drom shouted, as the ship began to lift off, still firing weapons at Boba Fett. Tubacca huffed loudly. Drom conceded, “You can pick the music,” as The Copper Eagle barrel rolled through the atmosphere.
Tubacca chortled agreeably, and approximated a familiar tune, as best as the wookie language would allow, as he called up the music program and punched the start button.
The music started, and Drom complained, “Aw, no! Again? What kind of music is that for a starship chase?” The wookie snarled. “Fine! Have it your way! It’s not even the right season for that though.” Tubacca curled his lip and huffed at Drom, then happily drummed his furry fingers on the console, as the music continued.
“A ship’s rising from the planet!” shouted ’Tar. She scanned a display, and added, “It’s the Slave I! Get this crate moving!”
“Relax!” called Drom. “This may not be The ’Falcon, but it’s still got hyperdrive. Leaving the galaxy’s best bounty hunter in our stardust, in three, two…” Drom’s countdown was interrupted by the ship rocking violently, and the sound of an explosion from the cargo area.
“We’ve been hit!” screamed his sister.
Drom’s hands blurred over the control console, trying to steady the ship. “I’m aware of that!” He hit a few more buttons, and The Copper once again returned fire on Boba Fett, and listed a little in its flight. Tubacca gave out a disgruntled arf. “Shut up, hairball! I’m driving, you got to pick the music!” His hands glided over the console, and he called out, “Hang on! I’m taking her into that asteroid field!”
The Copper tipped upwards at almost a ninety degree angle, spinning sideways as it did so, and angled around towards the biggest asteroid Drom could see. The cannons stuttered only long enough for Slave I to land one more hit on their tail section. The Copper listed more pronounced as it swung around the space rock, and from Slave I, Boba Fett saw a large explosion from the far side of the asteroid.
Fett checked his readouts, and saw that a tie fighter was just escaping the planetary atmosphere, far behind him. He flipped a switch and transmitted to the surviving stormtrooper, “Let Lord Vader know that the contract is fulfilled, Empire credits are appreciated, and I will return in one week.”
“Sir?” asked the stormtrooper, plainly nervous about delivering Fett’s message.
“You heard that music they were transmitting! I must track down the composer, and kill him for getting that wretched tune stuck in my head! Fett out!” Slave I leapt into hyperdrive and was gone.
The stormtrooper flipped his communication switch off, and slumped a bit in the cockpit. “Great. Like I really want to deliver that message. ‘Sorry, Lord Vader – Boba Fett’s gone to kill an earworm.’ Jeez, why doesn’t he bake a soufflé, as long as he’s going crazy?” He considered for a second, then snorted, “Yeah, right. Mandalorians can’t cook soufflés! Talk about crazy!” He chuckled derisively, then went silent for a few minutes, brooding while the tie fighter engines whined. Slowly, his fingers began to tap out a beat on the control stick, and then his head began to tip from one side to the other. He soon began humming, and as the fighter flew on, he began to sing to himself lightly, “What do you get a wookie for Christmas…”
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