Bio #2 : Le Loup hurle

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#1  Edited By poze

Part 0) http://www.comicvine.com/forums/fan-fic-8/bio0prologue-682459/#4/

Part 1) Bio #1 : Dirty Start

He drove me threw the whole country,in to an old cave with a secret entrance. We were greeted by scientists and soldier interrupting they’re training or experiments with various weapons,chemicals and even sometimes creatures. He took me to a huge office with a big desk with a picture of La Pie and his family. He smiled and said: « So Jean now I am honored to present you your soon to be new home. » He smiled like a child getting candy. I was horrified by that idea. I wasn’t ready for everything that happened. I was paralyzed for a few seconds so he said concerned but cheerful: « So how do you feel? » I look at him full of rage with my fist burning in bright purple flames. I growled with an animalistic voice filled with rage and sadness: « I feel like ripping of your head and burn your f*cking body! » I was ready to slash off his baled head. But he stayed calm not even a bit concerned and spoke with a stone cold voice: « We have your mother Jean,don’t try anything to wild or you will never see her again.Do as we say and you might continue a happier life with her » His coldness was quickly followed by euphoria! He almost shouted like child on Christmas Evening: « God I can’t wait for it! I have been waiting for this moment for thirteen years! You will be our new Jesus! You will save this world by creating wonders like he did before! Jean! You are way more powerful then you think! » He stopped quickly to breath fast like he just ran a marathon. I looked at him and said effortlessly: « So. What should I do? » « First we need to check your powers. » I said : « Ok. »

« Plasma projection? »

« You mean my fire? Yeah! »

« Good,superior human abilities? »

« Well I am almost better at everything then other human so I think so »

« Animalistic senses? »

« Yes I can smell your sweat under your dirty armpit! »

He almost smiled with his mouth halfway threw turning back to a serious face then he looked me straight in the eyes and said cold but with a joyful undertone: « You will have to train first for a few time somewhere safe. So soon the wolf can howl.

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I entered the office. He turned around happy as always. « Jean! Jean! I heard that you were ready! » I smiled and whispered but loud enough for him to hear: « Soon I can slash off that ugly head! » He didn’t stop to smile and replied: « After five years still the same! » The fat man started to laugh. « Anyway, Follow me. » He walked my to a huge door made of steel in front of it were the twins. « Well you know those two gentlemen,They can use some enhanced parts of their brain giving them the power to control to a certain degree other people » I glared at the two french twins, they showed no reaction and simply turned around entering some codes and opened the doors. La Pie looked aimed his eyes at me full of amaze : « The five year long training on the King Islands were really important, lets see if this hard training was not for nothing! » We all looked inside the door in which we could spot several men chained up all in prisoner uniforms and in front of them were several weapons. They were about 30 men. I starred at them and I knew what to do, La Pie knew it but explained anyway: « These men are dangerous criminals, rapists,murderer etc. They would be executed secretly by the government anyway. So kill them or you will get killed,we promised to all of them their freedom if one of them kills you! » My flames ignited and one of the twins pushed a button freeing the prisoners from their chains, they instantly grabbed their weapons and attacked me. It was a massacre,burned and cut bodies and body part everywhere. I killed them all in about half an hour. La Pie told me that it was good and was amazed that they didn’t even seem to have injured me that much. I ignored everything he said and walk past the two twins looking them straight in the eyes.They knew directly what I thought and what I felt. The arrogance has left their eyes and was replaced by fear. I looked slightly at La Pie and he was mesmerized and amazed by the lethal animal he had created. "Laisse le loup hurler!"

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cbishop

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@poze: Using <<>> to indicate that they are speaking a non-English language is great, but when you use French at the end, it should be in quotes: "Laisse le loup hurler!" because it is not translated for the reader.

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@cbishop: Thank you I corrected it :) and how is the story so far?

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@poze: Could use the large blocks of writing split up a bit, especially where the foreign dialect is. As for the story,on that I can't coment due to difficulty tracking what is going on

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@poze: I haven't decided yet. I'll let you know. ;)

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@impurestcheese: yes it is kind of confusing it will make sense soon :D and thank you

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