#1 Posted by lorbo (1541 posts) - - Show Bio

Main character is Winn, but she is first known as Claire, before she ever aquires superpowers. Here goes...........

Present

Claire is sitting in her office typing away, she is almost finished updating the accounts report for the month. The door to her office opens and in comes her boss—Greg Land. Right after him comes Larry, his assistant, who quietly shuts the door. By then Claire had stopped typing and was looking at them.

“Hi Greg, how can I help you?” She had a feeling he had bad news, judging by the look on his face, but just in case he was joking—she was keeping cool. Nothing had changed, everything was status quo; she hoped anyway. “Were you drinking alcohol in the break room two nights ago?” Greg asked her. Claire's eyes lit up, she was shocked to even hear such an accusation. “Of course not--I know better than that.” she replied. Greg was was not phased, he didn't believe her. He took an Ipad that Larry was holding and showed it to her. On screen was Claire in the break room chugging a bottle of Vodka. “I didn't think you of all people would do this, but what's worse is that you lied to me.” he said.

Reasoning was useless. Despite all her claims to the contrary and her previous exemplary performance, she could not beat the damning video. In a matter of days she was out of a job—a good job. Bewildered as she was, she didn't know who to blame. She was sure she was not guilty, but how she was on camera doing dumb stuff was beyond her. Of course claims of having an evil doppelganger would not be taken seriously, but what else could she say? Anger welled up within, she knew not why or who was behind it all, but she certainly would find out.

#2 Posted by Pyrogram (38509 posts) - - Show Bio

Interesting , going to be interesting to see how your things pan out.

#3 Posted by wildvine (9659 posts) - - Show Bio

Good notes: Good details. And the ending actually hooked my interest. Bad notes: Too short. Your dialogue feels a bit canned.

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#4 Posted by lorbo (1541 posts) - - Show Bio

With research my dialogue will get better, this is my first story. However even then, I am a minimalist, so do not expect me to put a lot of dialogue between characters that will have little to do with each other through out the entire story. I write what needs to be said. I could have had Claire defend herself in the dialogue, but as that would have been pointless (she would have lost anyway), I just referenced it instead. Scenes with a lot of dialogue are good for showing off a character's personality, and I will do that, as we go. I will write everyday, as practice makes perfect.

#5 Posted by lorbo (1541 posts) - - Show Bio

Part 2 Chap one Present (the story continues)

Going over what happened two nights ago in her mind, she knew she was not even at the break room during the alleged incident. She had went to her favorite restaurant around 6pm. The incident happened at 6:15 according to the camera footage, catching her double walking into the office at 6:10. With little to go on, Claire decided to call the office for any info she could get.

"Hello, may I speak to Larry please?" she said.

"What is your call regarding?" replied the cold office lady's voice. "It's me Claire, it's about a confidential matter; is he around?" "Ohh....yes, wait just a moment.", she replied.

Larry takes the call from his office with his door shut, "Hi Claire, how are you? I hope your OK...."

"I am, I wanted to know.....I know it sounds crazy but whoever you saw on camera was not me, I'm sure of it---"

"Claire? Have you sought out help? With your problem?”

As I have said---it was not me.”

OK... let's say it wasn't you, do you you have a twin, and if so---why would she do that to you?”

Look....I have no twin, I just need some information so I can get to the bottom of this. Did she say anything to anyone?”

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