Come on, Richard Nixon is the bomb! He's a well of great quotes:
- "Our planet has been through a lot this year, but we have not forgotten what is truly important... the great taste of Charleston Chew!"
- "Listen here, missy. Computers may be twice as fast as they were in 1973, but your average voter is as drunk and stupid as ever. The only thing that's different is me; I've become bitter, and let's face it, crazy over the years. And once I'm swept into office, I'll sell our children's organs to zoos for meat, and I'll go into people's houses at night and wreck up the place. Muahahaha!"
- "I um...am I under oath when I take the oath?"