You vs The Food Chain

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IfDCRuledTheWorld

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#1  Edited By IfDCRuledTheWorld

Scenario: You and 4 hunting buddies are on your way hunting when a bright light blinds you and you guys crash your truck. You guys wake up and find yourselves on a deserted forest. A voice inside your head says that if you can survive the island for a day you will be taken back home. One of your team has a broken ankle. Another has a dislocated shoulder on his shooting arm. And another suffers mild cuts and bruises which will attract some blood thirsty animals to your camp. Can you and your team survive the whole day?

You guys have the following supplies:

  • 2 (16oz) water bottles each
  • sunblock
  • hunting knife and machete each
  • 2 granola bars each
  • cigarettes w/lighter
  • hunting rifle w/scope each (4 bullets per gun)

6 a.m. (Wake up and finds snakes in your camp)

vs. 2 Rattlesnakes

10 a.m. (Are surprised during your snake breakfast)

vs. 3 Coyotes

12 p.m. (No warning...2 members have left to get more water, they attack your base and go after your bruised and battered group member)

vs. 2 Voltures

4 p.m.(Attack on your camp, but you had 10 min. to prepare)

vs. 2 Wild Boars

6 p.m.(Surprise attack during dinner, 5 min. prep, sunset, limited vision)

vs. 1 Brown Bear

10 p.m.(Paranoid, can't sleep, somewhat hungry still, 5 min. prep, absolute darkness)

vs. 3 Wolves

2 a.m.(Absolute darkness still, no sleep, no prep time)

vs. 1 Jaguar

6 a.m.(Early morning, some sleep, hungry, no prep time)

vs. 3 Wild Turkeys

How many of you survive? And how?

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Jokergeist

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#2  Edited By Jokergeist

6:00 a.m. I kill the snakes.

6:05 a.m. I eat the snakes.

6:10 a.m I die from snake poison. The End.

Sincerely,

No Caption Provided

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PrinceAragorn1

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#3  Edited By PrinceAragorn1

@IfDCRuledTheWorld: Nicely made.

Rattle snakes: Cleared. No problem with snakes.

Coyotes: With help from bruised friend, giving a wood on fire in hands of the rest, clearable.

Vultures: Annoying. But clearable.

Hereafter, better to move on a tree. Two on each. Mr. Bruise with the Mr. broken ankle, I with Mr. Shoulder.

Wild boar: Dangerous, But clearable with 4 bullets. One rifle gone.

Brown Bear: If on the tree, still clearable. Four bullets and fire wood. Scare it away, or well aimed shots. If not, eight bullets gone. Last rifle. Still less chance.

Three wolves: Nearly chance to survive, with no prep. Sitting on trees with fire could help.

Jaguar: Nearly no chance. one/two remaining bullet each may do the trick.

3 wild Turkeys? If survived by miracle through the night, take this out due to enthusiasm :)

Lighter used to lit fire. I don't smoke :)

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OmgOmgWtfWtf

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#4  Edited By OmgOmgWtfWtf

I live in an area with Wild Turkeys and I won't lie, they are some mean SOBs.

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Jean199999

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#5  Edited By Jean199999

God I love those "You vs" threads.

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dondave

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#6  Edited By dondave

@Jean199999 said:

God I love those "You vs" threads.

QFT

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CaptainDoeo

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#7  Edited By CaptainDoeo

@Jean199999 said:

God I love those "You vs" threads.

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Jean199999

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#8  Edited By Jean199999

6 a.m. (Wake up and finds snakes in your camp)

I take care of those snakes aided by my friend with the broken ankle (bait).

We then make a fire and chop some wood to make ankle braces for our guy with the broken ankle. We tend to our cut & bruised friend with half a bottle of water and some herbs.

10 a.m. (Are surprised during your snake breakfast)

This one is tricky. We shoot near the coyotes, that will startle them and hopefully make them leave. We are safe for now but they might come back later. We'll have to elaborate a plan to deal with them, maybe make traps and stuff.

12 p.m. (No warning...2 members have left to get more water, they attack your base and go after your bruised and battered group member)

By then my bruised friend's wounds are cauterized and obviously not bleeding anymore. I shoot them using all 4 of my rounds (our shooter has a bad shoulder, I'm a lousy shot).

We have grilled vultures barbecue (I wish we had beer)

4 p.m.(Attack on your camp, but you had 10 min. to prepare)

Our shooter with the bad shoulder will have to power through.We set him up a tree, someone else (former bruised and not recovering friend) on a tree opposite. We have a nice dinner and forget the desperate nature of our situation for a while.

6 p.m.(Surprise attack during dinner, 5 min. prep, sunset, limited vision)

We lose our friend with the bad ankle. Manly tear are shed, plus our bruised friend injuries have re-opened, which makes us targets to the most predatory of wildlife.

That explains the paranoia that ensues

10 p.m.(Paranoid, can't sleep, somewhat hungry still, 5 min. prep, absolute darkness)

We manage to get rid of one of them, kill the one. badly injure the remaining one while he was eating our friend with the bruises. He retracts into the forest.

2 a.m.(Absolute darkness still, no sleep, no prep time)

We lose our bad shoulder shooter, and I also die trying to rescue him. Our only remaining friend barely manage to escape with a bloody arm.

6 a.m.(Early morning, some sleep, hungry, no prep time)

To their great satisfaction, the 3 wild turkeys find the remaining human passed out from blood loss and exhaustion, and then proceed with payback for last thanksgiving dinner where they lost their cousin Bob. They have an uninvited guest: the coyotes we let go the day before.(we forgot about them- too busy getting mauled I guess)

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Alchemax_7

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#9  Edited By Alchemax_7

I and all my friends die in the truck crash.

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Jean199999

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#10  Edited By Jean199999

@Alchemax_7 said:

I and all my friends die in the truck crash.

Hahahaha

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PrinceAragorn1

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#11  Edited By PrinceAragorn1

@Jokergeist said:

6:00 a.m. I kill the snakes.

6:05 a.m. I eat the snakes.

6:10 a.m I die from snake poison. The End.

Sincerely,

No Caption Provided

lol

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ArticulateT

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#12  Edited By ArticulateT

6 a.m. (Wake up and finds snakes in your camp)

vs. 2 Rattlesnakes

How we deal with it:

With machete and knife in hand, we split spend the morning circling the snakes and attempting swift strikes to the head. Due to the quick movements of the snakes, we make sure to all pitch in, and use whatever we find lying around as a distraction.

6:30 a.m.

using the cigarettes, we part ways for a few minutes, lighting the packs in different spots to generate a more potent smell, and provide a form of distraction for other animals. We then head back and spend the rest of the morning tending to the wounded as best we can.

10 a.m. (Are surprised during your snake breakfast)

vs. 3 Coyotes

How we deal with it:

Chances are we lose someone here, more than likely the guy with the bad arm. Using a similar strategy to the snakes, we hack away at the machetes until the Coyotes flee or perish. We spend the rest of the morning arguing how and why we should bury our fallen comrade.

12 p.m. (No warning...2 members have left to get more water, they attack your base and go after your bruised and battered group member)

vs. 2 Voltures

How we deal with it:

Chances are, if the Vultures go after the living dude, then it'd be me and bad-ankle guy going for the water. Chances are, since Vultures are carrion eaters, they'd dine on our fallen friend, but if not, then bruised and battered dude could waste time making deft strikes with the machete until we got back to help. Bruised guy gets more bruises, but if otherwise fine.

4 p.m.(Attack on your camp, but you had 10 min. to prepare)

vs. 2 Wild Boars

How we deal with it:

The three of us spend time attempting to make traps out of what we have, if only to make the fight a bit easier on ourselves. When the boars arrive, we set upon them with the machetes and knives and grant ourselves a nice bit of pork, at least until the next attack.

6 p.m.(Surprise attack during dinner, 5 min. prep, sunset, limited vision)

vs. 1 Brown Bear

How we deal with it:

Using our limited understanding of nature, we do as the National Geographic channel instructs and make ourselves as big as possible in an attempt to scare the bear off. Failing this, we repeat plan rattle snake, only this time using the guns.

10 p.m.(Paranoid, can't sleep, somewhat hungry still, 5 min. prep, absolute darkness)

vs. 3 Wolves

How we deal with it:

We spend the prep time attempting to identify the alpha male of the pack. Regardless, we resort to the guns again. We more than likely lose our friend with the bad ankle.

2 a.m.(Absolute darkness still, no sleep, no prep time)

vs. 1 Jaguar

How we deal with it.

Surprised, we once again lose someone, and lacking sleep, I basically unload into the jaguar.

6 a.m.(Early morning, some sleep, hungry, no prep time)

vs. 3 Wild Turkeys

How we deal with it:

Putting it simply, I have no knowledge on the fighting ability of wild turkeys. Much like geese, they're probably vicious as all hell. I pick up whatever bullets I have left and take some body shots. At the end of it all, I'm battered, bruised and mentally scarred, but I survive.

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IfDCRuledTheWorld

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I don't mind too much of the You vs. threads...just some of the absurdity of the scenarios.

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TheAmazingImmortalMan

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@Alchemax_7 said:

I and all my friends die in the truck crash.

LOL

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SupermanWins465

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#15  Edited By SupermanWins465

are we blood lusted?

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IfDCRuledTheWorld

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@SupermanWins465:

As in willing too kill each other if necessary...up to you, I guess. It's your buddies. If you want to use them as bait, then go ahead.

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Pyrogram

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#18  Edited By Pyrogram

6 a.m. (Wake up and finds snakes in your camp) vs. 2 Rattlesnakes

Stomp them with shoes and machetes, then make a fire and eat, then gather supplies and make fence to defend our self's.

10 a.m. (Are surprised during your snake breakfast) vs. 3 Coyotes

Get sticks and use the fire to scare coyotes away.. Or just machete them. - But they would run in real life.

12 p.m. (No warning...2 members have left to get more water, they attack your base and go after your bruised and battered group member) vs. 2 Voltures

Use the bruised friend as a distraction and have him throw the bars on the floor and begin to machete them.

4 p.m.(Attack on your camp, but you had 10 min. to prepare) vs. 2 Wild Boars

Set up a trap and burn them to death.

6 p.m.(Surprise attack during dinner, 5 min. prep, sunset, limited vision) vs. 1 Brown Bear

Shoot him - probably use most bullets.

10 p.m.(Paranoid, can't sleep, somewhat hungry still, 5 min. prep, absolute darkness) vs. 3 Wolves

Broken ankle friend dies. But we use the fire to scare them again so they run or we stomp with machete. Begin to fortify again in a circle. Any bullets left we use.

2 a.m.(Absolute darkness still, no sleep, no prep time) vs. 1 Jaguar

Break a whole in the defenses and lure it in, once it is trapped we leave and set the place on fire, dead.

6 a.m.(Early morning, some sleep, hungry, no prep time) vs. 3 Wild Turkeys

Kill them.

How many of you survive? And how?

All but one.

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202122

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#19  Edited By 202122

I don't believe in killing animals so i kill the three guys with three bullets and then hide in the tree

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TheDude123

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#20  Edited By TheDude123

I survive all, solo, by killing them in various ways.

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Epicbeast3000

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#21  Edited By Epicbeast3000

Rattle snake: I kill them with my machete

coyotes: My friend and I could kill them with my machate

Vultures: kill them with rifles

wild boars: This will be hard, we have 6 bullets left one in the head to each will do, but if we miss, we have little chance of surviving.

Brown bear: Definatly using a gun, one bullet in the head, 3-4 bullets in the body, if we miss the head, then we r dead for sure.

wolfs: I knock out my friend and lure the wolfs to him, while the wolves feast on him I built a fire to see where they are and snipe the wolfs

Jaguar: I make a torch, since i am out of all my bullets, I will have to use my machate and hunting knife, I lure the cat near a tree, I throw the torch on the tree and the cat runs away, it wil get a few burns so it can't run at full speed or agility. I run at the cat, it scratches me and I am injured. I get my machate and slash it across the face. Then I run and throw hot ciggies at the jaguar, hopefully they hurt and the jaguar gets distracted. I throw my friend's dead body on it, The jaguar frees himself but he is too late as I have already jammed a machate through its neck. Later I skinn the jaguar and wear a jaguar hide so I look like a beast.

wild turkey: After a long day, I finaly see my reward, 3 wildturkeys. I kill them with my knife and eat them like people eat in epic meal time.

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Jokergeist

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#22  Edited By Jokergeist

Bump.

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Jorgevy

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#23  Edited By Jorgevy

I graduated top of my SEALS class so I clear it using the rifles with a precision of the likes that have never been seen on this Earth

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BlueHope

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#24  Edited By BlueHope

6 a.m. (Wake up and finds snakes in your camp)

--> I got poisoned f****!

10 a.m. (Are surprised during your snake breakfast)

vs. 3 Coyotes

--> I lost a arm f****!

12 p.m. (No warning...2 members have left to get more water, they attack your base and go after your bruised and battered group member)

vs. 2 Voltures

-->I lost a eye f****!

4 p.m.(Attack on your camp, but you had 10 min. to prepare)

vs. 2 Wild Boars

-->I lost a feet f****

6 p.m.(Surprise attack during dinner, 5 min. prep, sunset, limited vision)

vs. 1 Brown Bear

-->I shit my pants f****!

10 p.m.(Paranoid, can't sleep, somewhat hungry still, 5 min. prep, absolute darkness)

vs. 3 Wolves

-->My friends run away f****!

2 a.m.(Absolute darkness still, no sleep, no prep time)

vs. 1 Jaguar

--> I lost my other arm f****!

6 a.m.(Early morning, some sleep, hungry, no prep time)

vs. 3 Wild Turkeys

--> I give up, Turkeys put a end to my misery

How many of you survive? And how?

-->My 4 friends, because they let me to die while they escape from the madness

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YourNeighborhoodComicGeek

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I die.

Horribly.

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TheDude123

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#26  Edited By TheDude123

@Jokergeist said:

No Caption Provided

6:00 a.m. I kill the snakes.

6:05 a.m. I eat the snakes.

6:10 a.m I die from snake poison. The End.

Sincerely,

You can ingest snake venom with no real problems unless you have ulcers or open wounds in the mouth.