You vs Sakura Haruno Pre Shippuden

This is Sakura Pre-Chuunin Exam and current you

No preparation, restriction but full knowledge

No weapons and no any kind of jutsu allowed

H2H only

Speed equalize if necessary

Win by K.O

Location :

Who will win?

This is joke battle

Sakura stomps.

unless i get guns, she kicks my ass.

every genin rank ninja was above human level, and can walk on water/on trees.theres 3 basic powers every genin has. clones, subsitution and transforming into other people or objects.

they also train in ninja kumite, which is H2H, weapons accuracy and chakra control.

and her battles demonstrated she could keep up with people who should be way faster, superhuman durability (a giant sand demon slammed her into a tree and she was still conscious) and focus chakra into her feet for a burst of speed.

this.

I got this.

"Hey Sakura I heard sasuke is dating someone"

Sure, Sakura.

"Hey Sakura I heard sasuke is dating someone"

thatd just make her want to kill you even more, for lying to her.

@uft: How would she tell? This is pre chuunin exam Sakura we are talking about.

and useless is a part of sakura's character.

Any kind of technique in naruto verse are not allowed, this is pure H2H

Ends in sex.

............With a 12 year old?

I'm not a rapist.

@con7879: That's 18 in anime years.

@the_stegman: The FBI would like to have a word with you sir.

True. but still, Sakura? shes nasty.

@con7879: But once you go pink...I don't even need to finish that...

@the_stegman: Sadly that is the truth of anime logic.

She beats me senseless btw.

Sakura's a horrible ninja but she's still a ninja.

I get speed-blitzed and one-shot.

True......and the age of consent in Japan is apparently 13 so if you stack those two facts together............

This is pre chuunin exam Sakura we are talking about.

and useless is a part of sakura's character.

no its bullshit that haters say about her. your not useless if you can trounce any normal human and walk on trees like they arent even there.

even if your use is taking an arrow instead of a stronger soldier, thats still a use.

You want to have sex with sakura? That's disgusting. Ino is better

She rushes in to knock my head off, but I stare right past her and talk about how angsty I am and she falls in love with the way I completely disregard her. I tell her I'll meet her in our special place under the moonlight, she goes off to wait and technically BFRs herself. And I laugh. And laugh.

PS. F*ck Ino. Tsunade's where it's at. Only kids want a noob, I prefer experience...(and tig bitties)

lol

She rushes in to knock my head off, but I stare right past her and talk about how angsty I am and she falls in love with the way I completely disregard her. I tell her I'll meet her in our special place under the moonlight, she goes off to wait and technically BFRs herself. And I laugh. And laugh.

she wouldnt give a fuck. her love for sasuke began long before the massacre, and only continued because he kept saving her. its sublte, even for kishi, but sasuke genuinely liked her as a comrade.

IIRC she didnt immediately like sai just because he had a sad backstory.

@the_stegman: pretty sure that is not going to end well for you.

As for me, since that stadium is empty, I'd rather forfeit by self BFR. I'd rather live to see another day than get my ass beat and killed.

Agreed

@uft: if by saving her you mean trying to kill her multiple times and telling her off more than once, and showing nearly zero regard for her as a person throughout 99.9% of the series....sure lol I can do that too.

Check it, I'll freak her out with smartphone apps then right when she's getting into it Ill just throw it on the ground, stomp on it, then stare past her at something random to trick her into thinking there's more to it. She'll be like "wow, he's so deep and mysterious!" Then, suddenly, I'll say something dark and angsty like "I hate my dad!" and then try to strangle her or something. She'll be head. Over. Heels. For this buff stuff.

Then I'll be all like "Listen, BIT$H. Go to the spot. I MIGHT show up. Now don't even look at me." And BAM! Win by ring out.

I will have to show up n pretend to care if I wanna get rid of her, though. If I just ignore her afterwards she'll probably think that's hot n just never go away. Psycho.

I win via Acting Emo

by saving her you mean trying to kill her multiple times and telling her off more than once, and showing nearly zero regard for her as a person throughout 99.9% of the series.

he cared about and showed regard for her in most of part 1, and probably pre massacre too. "telling her off" was the point. he needs her to be strong, and his beration caused her to train harder.

and the kill attempts were mutual. sasuke was acting in what amounts to self defence. you dont abandon a friend just because they are going wayward. thats what sakura ultimately realised,and her final attempt to talk sasuke down showed that she would not give up on him. love doesnt always make sense after all. and we dont know how much time passed before sakura truly believed sasuke was good again.

after all she loves the man he was, not the man he turned into thanks to itachi and obitos manipulations. and once that boy came back in chapter 699, we realised she was right about him all along and that part of sasuke was always inside him. that inner good that drove her to become better. that need to save that boy she used to know.

Check it, I'll freak her out with smartphone apps then right when she's getting into it Ill just throw it on the ground, stomp on it, then stare past her at something random to trick her into thinking there's more to it. She'll be like "wow, he's so deep and mysterious!" Then, suddenly, I'll say something dark and angsty like "I hate my dad!" and then try to strangle her or something. She'll be head. Over. Heels. For this buff stuff.

or she will laugh and split your head in half. as is in character for her. she wouldnt say that. she would be like "fuck this dude is creepy considering hes a random freak with a weird radio thing".

there was a significant amount of time between sakura becoming ino's friend and announcing her crush on sasuke. we dont even know what it was that caused her to feel that. like i said, it likely was her sensing that potential for heroism and greatness in sasuke.

I will have to show up n pretend to care if I wanna get rid of her, though. If I just ignore her afterwards she'll probably think that's hot n just never go away. Psycho.

nah she would laugh and kill you. she would never think that's "hot" given she's a kind and wonderful girl who would lay down her life in a heartbeat for any konoha citizen. given how the ninja world works, any non konoha fighter is seen as mistrustworthy AT BEST. and a full hostile enemy at worst.

I would f*ck her... up

@uft: pal, you're taking it way too seriously lol a genin could solo all of Comicvine, there's no need to use actual feats for this. Back in my day, we could tell any joke we wanted. You kids these days...

But since we're on it:

1. For the most part he ignored her and acknowledged her as minimally as possible. For the most part he was caught in his own agenda.

2. She was into sasuke in literally the first episode. There was no significant time gap at all lol she just saw him, thought he was cool, and fell in love immediately. These feelings were never even remotely returned the entire series lol whatever coupling happened took place off panel. And his "self defense" happened to be completely remorseless with absolutely no concern for her what so ever. And also preemptive (lmfao). Even when they do get together, he just knocks her up and runs away, leaving her as an (absolutely livid) single mother.

CAAAAAAN YOU FEEEEEL THE LOOOOOOVE, TOOOOONIGHT?! (Sakura can't)

3. He never became the boy he was again, ever. Being nice for ten seconds in 699 is not reverting to his previous mentality. You're trying to see something that isn't actually there. He is a completely different person than before, in a completely different phase of his life.

4. You're speculating as to what she saw in him. In her own words, she explains: "He's so cool!" And any elaboration that followed was generally around those lines. In her eyes, he $hits gold no matter what he does. To her it wasn't a matter of "why do I love him", it was "how can I not?!". Meanwhile, the most he ever responded was by treating her as a basic teammate (and finally taking ten minutes to explore his natural teenage urges after she tactlessly threw herself at him the entire series). THAT is creepy (of her). Truely, such a deep character.

5. It's not like Konoha Ninja are racist against non-konoha people (anymore). Yes, they are aware that ninjas could be anywhere, in any bush (lol), but that is a basic precaution in a world full of ninjas. They are not unreasonably threatened by nonthreatening people lol. If anything, konoha is seemingly the most outgoing of all the major villages as they were the pioneers of trying to form their little kage union.

I blitz this fodder

lol she's no longer fodder in the end of series

This is Pre-Shippuden, so I won't be surprised if Sakura suddenly busted into tears for no reason and BFR herself.

>Within perfect range to use that Kunai

>Cuts her hair off instead.

@andr413: "Cut my hair....or this f*cker's arm off....hmmmm...."

I mean, she could have at least nicked a finger or something, sheesh.

(Coming to this thread is like taking a hot bath in Sakura hate. It feels wonderful lmao)

Yeah we seems like bullying Sakura, she's already useless and we're still mocking them. How pathetic she is, i feel guilty after making this thread

@andr413: well no, I mean she does win here. Easilly. But still, it is pretty funny to break down every aspect of why she sucks lol

No way, I've learnt martial arts for 7 years. I'm pretty sure i can beat her after long fight

bump

She's useless, but she's not that useless.

@andr413: No way, I've learnt martial arts for 7 years. I'm pretty sure i can beat her after long fight

Can you move faster than sound?

Not to mention, I have plenty hax and DC to beat her.

One punch would make anyone's head explode like we were in Scanners.

Heheh