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#1 Edited by Pope052 (3106 posts) - - Show Bio

Batman

Scenario:

Now obviously, you're not taking down the goddamn Batman, not now, not ever,

But what if you were "forced" to....?

Here's the scenario....

You had been kidnapped by the Joker just over 2 days ago, he brought you into some small abandoned warehouse, and here is what he blackmailed you with:

"You have one year, if you do not kill the Batman within that time . I will give you the most excruciating death imaginable"

"I'll be watching"...

"(Hehehehehahahahaha)" you overheard the Joker laughing as he left the warehouse, you were free to go and needed to get started planning out on how you're going to take down the Batman.

It was near impossible you thought, but you had to do it..

As soon as you were fully prepared and the year had passed, you were ready.

You set out to the specified battlefield (see below), and you see the Caped Crusader staring right at you, ready to fight...

Battlefield:

You receive choices of:

  • Equipment
  • Training
  • Powers
  • Allies

Equipment Choices:

Fire-Arms:

Pick one of the following:

  • Desert Eagle - 9 Bullets + 1 extra cartridge also containing 9 bullets.
  • Mini Uzi - 20 Bullets + 1 extra cartridge containing 8 bullets.
  • Barret 50.Cal, 2 Rounds.
  • SPAS-12 Shotgun, 4 Rounds.

Melee/Defense Weapons

Pick one of the following:

  • Auriel's Shield
  • Glamdring
  • Legolas' Dual Blades
  • Set of Throwing Knives
  • Steel Warhammer

Armor:

  • Deathstroke's Armor

Training Choices:

You get 3 months worth of training from both choices you make, or you can choose just one trainer and get 6 months worth of training from him/her.

Choose one/two of the following:

  • Wolverine
  • Bronze Tiger
  • Black Panther
  • Lady Shiva

Powers:

You'll be given some low tier powers to aid you in the fight:

Pick two of the following:

  • Teleportation - Ability to teleport a maximum distance of 20 meters, & only 3 uses.
  • Pre Cog - Ability to see the next move Batman is going to do, allowing for dodging/countering, has 4 uses.
  • Enhanced Durability- You're as durable as a Silverback Gorilla, but only lasts for 10 seconds, can be utilized at any time but only once.
  • Smoke Generation - Ability to generate a considerable amount of smoke equivalent to a smoke bomb from your palms, can be used twice.

Allies:

Pick one of the following:

  • A Fully Grown, Bloodlusted Wolf.
  • Mike Tyson with Brass Knuckles.

Conditions:

  • Joker is invincible until the battle is over.
  • Batman is set out to kill you, fighting at his best.
  • You may not avoid the fight.
  • You lose all equipment, training, powers, allies when the battle is over, so you won't be able to take the Joker down.

Rules:

You:

  • Everything listed above.
  • You possess your knowledge of Batman, depending on yourself.
  • Morals Off, Bloodlusted, and fighting at your best.
  • If you're still failing miserably, you receive a short adrenaline rush doubling every aspect of yourself, but lasts 10 seconds.
  • Win by Death only.

Batman:

  • Pre 52 Version.
  • Standard Utility Belt Equipment.
  • Morals Off.
  • He is not aware that you're set out to kill him.
  • Win by Death, or KO.

Can you break the Bat...?

#2 Edited by 616Vulture (1470 posts) - - Show Bio

Barret 50.Cal, 2 Rounds.

Steel Warhammer

Trained By Black Panther and I take the Wolf.

Smoke Generation and teleportation

I teleport behind him at the beginning of the fight and hit him with the hammer as much as I can before he reacts I then teleport 20 meters away and shoot him once if I hit him in a vunerable fatal spot great I win but if I don't and he reaches me I either sick the wolf on him and once he takes care of it he is tired and hurt and I beat him to death or smoke generate and trip him and beat him to death with the hammer and I then take his mask off and shoot his head once

#4 Posted by Perethorn (3348 posts) - - Show Bio

I pick:

-The shotgun

-The warhammer

-Wolverine

-The bloodlusted wolf

-Teleportation

I send the Wolf to distract Batman, then i go and teleport just behind him and shot him. For secure the kill, i smash his head with the warhammer.

#5 Posted by 616Vulture (1470 posts) - - Show Bio
#6 Edited by Pope052 (3106 posts) - - Show Bio

@616vulture:

(Sigh) Read the OP completely..

You cannot teleport more than 20 meters.

#7 Posted by 616Vulture (1470 posts) - - Show Bio

@pope052 said:

@616vulture:

(Sigh) Read the OP completely..

You cannot teleport more than 20 meters.

Sorry edited again.

#8 Posted by Fallschirmjager (16826 posts) - - Show Bio

50.cal, 2 rounds

Shield

Trained by Black Panther

Wolf

Pre-Cog and Teleportation

------------

Teleport away and sick the wolf on him and use my Pre-Cog to shoot him. 1 shot from a 50 cal will kill anyone regardless of where you hit them. If you shoot someone in the hand with a .50, it will probably blow off their forearm if not their entire arm and they will bleed to death.

I've fired a .50 cal so I'm somewhat familiar with it.

Black Panther helps me for 6 months with target practice (he's the target :D). 6 months of hand to hand training wouldn't be enough so I'd rather perfect my shooting skills and I'm pretty sure BP is the fastest of the group, not to mention his suit would allow me to practice with live fire.

Pre-Cog helps me fire accurate shots and Teleportaton helps me relocate to shoot.

Took the shield just because...again...if the battle comes down to H2H or Close Combat....I lose so I have to kill him with my 2 shots.

Desert Eagle and Mini Uzi aren't worth it as his armor should be more than enough for small arms fire...Shotgun was tempting because of 4 shots but .50 cal has way better killing power.

#9 Edited by Pr0metheus (5088 posts) - - Show Bio

Uzi

Legolas Dual blades

Lady Shiva

Tele/Pre-Cog (Smoke is a terrible idea as you merely adopted the smoke and Batman was molded by it)

Wolf

Pre-Cog 2 times dodgeing his attacks and slicing up his suit,then teleport behind him and shoot in the sliced up Areas if this is his Bullet-proof suit. Teleport back infront and dodge another one of his attacks (One cog left) while he is now stumbleing fowards as i teleported back behind him repeatedly slash and do again with my last teleport/cog but this time use the rest of the bullets or slash again.

Then since i killed the Batman i'm going to go kill Joker.

#10 Posted by Jmarshmallow (5146 posts) - - Show Bio

No matter what I do, no matter what I have, matter who helps me, no matter how hard I train.....I would NEVER kill the Batman.

Instead, I'd just take all the equipment And training, then him and I would just fight the Joker together.

Jmarshmallow

#11 Edited by Batman242 (4860 posts) - - Show Bio

-Desert Eagle

-Legolas' Dual Blades

-3 months from Black Panther and 3 months from Lady Shiva

-Precognition and Teleportation

-Wolf

Well, seeing as I'm a threatening sight to Batman, we have an opening dialogue and he asks who I am and what am I doing. I tell him that the Joker kidnapped me and gave me a year to kill him or else I die. He plays along and stays away from Gotham for a week while Nightwing takes over and then Joker comes to congratulate me assuming that I threw his body away to the sharks and brought only his tattered cape and cowl with a little blood. Batman pops out of nowhere and we both beat Joker senseless and send him to Arkham.....

He breaks out and comes for me? I have a bloodlusted wolf and training from both T'Challa and Shiva along with precognitive and teleportation abilities and Deathstroke's armor. Not much he's gonna be able to do.

#12 Posted by Pr0metheus (5088 posts) - - Show Bio
#13 Edited by Fallschirmjager (16826 posts) - - Show Bio

@fallschirmjager: Wouldn't Wolverine allow you to use live fire a bit better?

Well...Black Panther should be faster and thus a harder target. And I think he can tank .50 cal rounds with his Vibranium suit.

Wolverine would be a good choice too. I just felt BP being a faster target would help me more.

#14 Edited by NICK31898 (2148 posts) - - Show Bio

Desert eagle

Legolas duel blades

Wolverine

Wolf

Teleportation, and Enhanced durability

First I teleport to him, use my durability, take him on with my blades, and just tire him out, then I make him preoccupied with my wolf, then I teleport away, shoot him 5 times. Boom.

#15 Posted by Pr0metheus (5088 posts) - - Show Bio

@fallschirmjager: Also IMO cause of the teleportation distance,Barrett is useless. He could cover the 20 feet in seconds and you start facing each other.

#16 Posted by Pope052 (3106 posts) - - Show Bio

@batman242:

Joker is spectating this entire battle, I forgot to mention (Let me edit that).

You only have those abilities for the fight with Batman, once it's over you return to the way you were before the Joker blackmailed you.

#17 Posted by Batman242 (4860 posts) - - Show Bio

@pope052 said:

@batman242:

Joker is spectating this entire battle, I forgot to mention (Let me edit that).

You only have those abilities for the fight with Batman, once it's over you return to the way you were before the Joker blackmailed you.

So I don't have the 6 months training or weapons any more after the fight?

#18 Posted by NICK31898 (2148 posts) - - Show Bio

50.cal, 2 rounds

Shield

Trained by Black Panther

Wolf

Pre-Cog and Teleportation

------------

Teleport away and sick the wolf on him and use my Pre-Cog to shoot him. 1 shot from a 50 cal will kill anyone regardless of where you hit them. If you shoot someone in the hand with a .50, it will probably blow off their forearm if not their entire arm and they will bleed to death.

I've fired a .50 cal so I'm somewhat familiar with it.

Black Panther helps me for 6 months with target practice (he's the target :D). 6 months of hand to hand training wouldn't be enough so I'd rather perfect my shooting skills and I'm pretty sure BP is the fastest of the group, not to mention his suit would allow me to practice with live fire.

Pre-Cog helps me fire accurate shots and Teleportaton helps me relocate to shoot.

Took the shield just because...again...if the battle comes down to H2H or Close Combat....I lose so I have to kill him with my 2 shots.

Desert Eagle and Mini Uzi aren't worth it as his armor should be more than enough for small arms fire...Shotgun was tempting because of 4 shots but .50 cal has way better killing power.

Did you just say that Batman's armour is to thick for a desert eagle? You do know that it is one of the most powerful handguns ever invented. Even if it didn't go through, a shot from that, the sheer force would knock even batman off his feet.

#19 Posted by OreoAssassin (4796 posts) - - Show Bio

Nice Battle!!! I think I would just teleport behind Joker and take him out. Then go to Batman and become his ally and keep my gear/powers.

#20 Edited by Fallschirmjager (16826 posts) - - Show Bio

@pr0metheus: OP says you can teleport 20 meters, not feet. 20 meters is 60~ feet. You probably wouldn't have time to go into a prone stance with the Barret, but you should be able to fire it at a kneel position. I'd would take training of course (6 months ;)

@nick31898: ...You know nothing about guns. Desert Eagles typically fire .357 or .44. .50 > .44, .357. The OP didn't specify what round. Even if it was a .50 cal DE the Barret is a RIFLE not a Hand gun. Rifles >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Hand guns in terms of velocity and stopping power.

#21 Posted by NICK31898 (2148 posts) - - Show Bio

@pr0metheus: OP says you can teleport 20 meters, not feet. 20 meters is 60~ feet. You probably wouldn't have time to go into a prone stance with the Barret, but you should be able to fire it at a kneel position. I'd would take training of course (6 months ;)

@nick31898: ...You know nothing about guns. Desert Eagles typically fire .357 or .44. .50 > .44, .357. The OP didn't specify what round. Even if it was a .50 cal DE the Barret is a RIFLE not a Hand gun. Rifles >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Hand guns in terms of velocity and stopping power.

I wasn't saying that the barret wasn't powerful, but he said that he didn't wan't the deagle, which is fine, but he also said small arms fire, which the deagle isn't, it is very powerful. Soooooo you need not to assume things.

#22 Posted by Fallschirmjager (16826 posts) - - Show Bio

@nick31898: Small arms is anything under .50 cal. Since .357 and .44 are more common versions of Desert Eagles. thats what I assume the OP was referring (if he specifies later so be it)...and that is small arms....

#23 Posted by LinkXV1 (490 posts) - - Show Bio

Firearm: Desert Eagle

Weapon: Dual Blades

Trainer: Black Panther

Powers: Teleport and Pre Cog

Ally: Mike Tyson (more effective against Bats IMO, and a bloodlusted wolf would probably slaughter me too)

Scenario: I teleport in back of Batman, and stab him repeatedly in the back until I get Mike to help me occupy him. Batman starts to tango with Mike, while I continue to stab him. I fire a few bullets into the now dazed and confused Batman, who's still trying to comprehend WTF just happened. I use my Pre Cog to help out me and Mike. I teleport in back of Mike, who's in the front while I was in the back, and tell him to duck. I then proceed to empty the rest of the clip INTO HIS FACE. If he's somehow alive still, I stab him some more and finish him with a DECAPATION! Me and Mike become the best of friends, and my life is complete, as I always hated Batman.

#24 Posted by NICK31898 (2148 posts) - - Show Bio

@nick31898: Small arms is anything under .50 cal. Since .357 and .44 are more common versions of Desert Eagles. thats what I assume the OP was referring (if he specifies later so be it)...and that is small arms....

But we don't know for sure, I actually read his post wrong, I thought he said small firearms.

#25 Posted by xlab3000 (3212 posts) - - Show Bio

Mini Uzi
Throwing Knives
Wolverine and Black Panther
Wolf
Precognition and Teleportion

1st I use precog to see Batman's next move, and I teleport behind him and shoot him with my mini uzi and throw my knives at him and then let my wolf eat him.


#26 Posted by NighThunder (3095 posts) - - Show Bio

Jesus , batmons not god, I could batman with just training from black panther , shield and maybe the 3rd gun. I stomp with whatever items i get.

#27 Edited by thelocust619 (2231 posts) - - Show Bio

D. Eagle, Legolas' blades (unused), training with black panther, power of precog, Mike Tyson.

I give Tyson the swords and let him roll in as a distraction. Of course there will be no opening, so I sprint in at an angle and hold up my left hand (distraction) as if to attack and fire the deagle through my hand while using 1 precog use. This will fail because he's batman, but now my status is losing. Trigger ALL THREE remaining precogs at once AND adrenaline to increase chances to maximum and dump as many rounds as i can in his mouthpiece. If he lives, i die.

Final: 6/4 I win. No human is dodging close range adrenalized precog gun fu while a machette wielding mike tyson is trying to kill him

Wait i get 2 powers? Oh....durability. triggers after i shoot my hand off. I win 8-2

FYI, no one is hitting him with the hammer that's just dumb, the swords are all pretty much useless. You're gonna stab batman. Really. 50 cal and deagle (smallest gun thus hardest to kick the barrel away) are the only usable objects, and a wolf is pretty much worthless against a morals off batman. 1 second distraction. At least Tyson has some defense...it all comes down to putting him in a position where no human could escape, such as making the most accurate shot humanly possible at close range from an angle he can't see (behind my hand) while he's already wasting movements dodging Tyson.

#28 Posted by AmazingAngel (4121 posts) - - Show Bio

Jesus , batmons not god, I could batman with just training from black panther , shield and maybe the 3rd gun. I stomp with whatever items i get.

I see your confusion, not Batmon.

BATMAN!

Aunt May could stomp Batmon.

#29 Edited by InFamous_Wolf (973 posts) - - Show Bio

Desert Eagle

Auriel's shield

Trained by Black Panther

Pre cog and teleportation

I pick the wolf

Scenario: I send my wolf off to distract Batman while shooting at him 7 times with the desert Eagle to throw him off. I then use pre cog and teleport behind him. I use pre cog again to see him throw a elbow my way. I dodge it and shoot him 2 times . But he's not down yet he breaks my wolf's neck and faces me. I go to get my extra cartridge but Batman knocks the gun out of my hand. I only have my shield now. I rush toward Batman and we go toe to toe blow for blow. Thanks to my training with Black Panther. Then Batman gets the upper hand and breaks one of my ribs. I start losing the fight but then my adrenaline rush kicks in.I charge towards Batman one last time and I break his mask and he falls to the ground. As I go for the kill Batman uses a taser on me me and I fall to the ground. He asks me way I'm doing this. I tell him to whole situation .We then go and team up to defeat the Joker.

#30 Posted by godzilla44 (3036 posts) - - Show Bio

No matter what I do, no matter what I have, matter who helps me, no matter how hard I train.....I would NEVER kill the Batman.

Instead, I'd just take all the equipment And training, then him and I would just fight the Joker together.

Jmarshmallow

this

#31 Posted by thelocust619 (2231 posts) - - Show Bio

Actually, imagine this combo: war hammer, precog, teleport in the air and just drop like Link's down A move in super smash brothers. Repeat as needed lol

#32 Posted by NorrinBoltagonPrime21 (5797 posts) - - Show Bio

Gun choice doesn't matter, he gets shot.

#33 Posted by ImaLoserForBeingHere (76 posts) - - Show Bio

@norrinboltagonprime21: His suit is bullet-proof against anything but a "straight-shot". Which is basically a bullet that hits the suit dead-on and not at an angle.

#34 Posted by Jokergeist (4935 posts) - - Show Bio

I let Joker kill me. The death of my fantasies.

Sincerely,

#35 Posted by Black_Arrow (2948 posts) - - Show Bio

@pope052: Do I get Deathstroke armor if I choose a melee weapon?

#36 Posted by Shawnbaby (10649 posts) - - Show Bio

I don't wait the whole year...I kill Bruce Wayne with a long range sniper shot to the head on Day 1.

#37 Posted by DigitalShooter9 (1595 posts) - - Show Bio

I would rather fight the joker with all the equipment....

#38 Posted by ScottishWarlord (155 posts) - - Show Bio

I take the Uzi and shoot myself...

#39 Posted by Enzeru (2954 posts) - - Show Bio

What keeps me from killing the Joker and making Harley Quinn my future bride?

#40 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3444 posts) - - Show Bio

why the ridiculously low amount of ammo?

I could by 100xtimes that amount of ammunition with a hundred dollars.

#41 Posted by TifaLockhart (14044 posts) - - Show Bio

Batman wins.

#42 Posted by BigCimmerian (8108 posts) - - Show Bio

LOL you really think you can take down Batman?

#43 Posted by Iragexcudder (4601 posts) - - Show Bio

Yeah Batman should beat me fairly easily.

But..

I would take the Uzi with the Aurial Shield with pre cog (knowing what mistake hell make and acting upon it) training from Black Panther and using The wolf as a pawn for the pre cog.

It only takes one good shot, with a gun that isn't known for it's accuracy, but is know for it's hip firing and deadliness. Maybe.. I could beat the bat. Maybe

#44 Edited by JackKnight (2969 posts) - - Show Bio

My Picks:

Fire-Arms:

  • Mini Uzi.

Melee/Defense Weapons:

  • Glamdring.

Training Choices:

  • Wolverine.
  • Black Panther.

Powers:

  • Teleportation.
  • Pre Cog.

Allie:

  • The bloodlusted Wolf.

Here's how the battle goes:

I see batman coming that me with the Pre Cog and he is about to glide kick me so I use the Teleportation and I teleport away and then Batman hits a wall, then I teleport the wolf right on Batman's head and the wolf bites and claws him allover while I watch and laugh.

then I teleport behind him and use the skills I learned from Wolverine & Black Panther and the Glamdring cut Batman up even more and slice off his arms and legs.

Then I take off Batman's mask and I'm shocked to see Bruce Wayne's face! but then I'm like "eh, never liked you anyways" then I finish Bruce off with the Uzi.

I stomp and this song plays:

Easy win.

#45 Posted by brainstorm01 (1292 posts) - - Show Bio

only one thing

Can i train by goku?

I will smash jl

#46 Posted by TifaLockhart (14044 posts) - - Show Bio

You guys are being serious? You think one year of training can turn anyone real life into a Batman buster? No offense.

#47 Posted by BigCimmerian (8108 posts) - - Show Bio

Yeah Batman should beat me fairly easily.

But..

I would take the Uzi with the Aurial Shield with pre cog (knowing what mistake hell make and acting upon it) training from Black Panther and using The wolf as a pawn for the pre cog.

It only takes one good shot, with a gun that isn't known for it's accuracy, but is know for it's hip firing and deadliness. Maybe.. I could beat the bat. Maybe

Batman is bulletproof.

#48 Posted by _Cerberus_ (3444 posts) - - Show Bio

@iragexcudder said:

Yeah Batman should beat me fairly easily.

But..

I would take the Uzi with the Aurial Shield with pre cog (knowing what mistake hell make and acting upon it) training from Black Panther and using The wolf as a pawn for the pre cog.

It only takes one good shot, with a gun that isn't known for it's accuracy, but is know for it's hip firing and deadliness. Maybe.. I could beat the bat. Maybe

Batman is bulletproof.

his face isn't

#49 Edited by eternityx (2734 posts) - - Show Bio

Me > Old man = Stan Lee = TOAA > Batman

So yeah, I destroy Batman with no weapons.

#50 Posted by JackKnight (2969 posts) - - Show Bio

Me > Old man = Stan Lee = TOAA > Batman

So yeah, I destroy Batman with no weapons.