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#1 Posted by Smog (18 posts) - - Show Bio

man of steel or man of round house kicks to the face...

#2 Posted by Forever (4332 posts) - - Show Bio

This thread is bringing down the internet.

#3 Posted by Boken (7757 posts) - - Show Bio

#4 Posted by Smog (18 posts) - - Show Bio

dude personaly, chuck norris will kill every superhero in the universe in a hour and have time to eat a oreo and a glass of milk... slowly.

#5 Posted by Smog (18 posts) - - Show Bio

u have know idea jack ass

#6 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Post Deleted.

#7 Posted by Phorqe (2109 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep... he waits.

#8 Posted by The Man Of Steel (28 posts) - - Show Bio

wow,harsh!

#9 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Post Deleted.

#10 Posted by The Man Of Steel (28 posts) - - Show Bio

Gambler says:

"The Man Of Steel says:
"wow,harsh!"

Shut the #@!% up. Thats harsh. flash"

flash?

#11 Posted by Eternal Chaos (22990 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck Norris. If Jesus can walk on water, Chuck can swim on land

#12 Posted by Eternal Chaos (22990 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck Norris. If Jesus can walk on water, Chuck can swim on land

#13 Posted by Prodigal Son (3473 posts) - - Show Bio

That was rather harsh fellas.

#14 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Prodigious Man says:

"That was rather harsh fellas."

Its a Superman vs Chuck Norris thread. If I make a thread this dumb, please, by all means tear into me. I'll take down my post this time, but thats strike one. lol

#15 Posted by Prodigal Son (3473 posts) - - Show Bio

Gambler says:

"Prodigious Man says:
"That was rather harsh fellas."

Its a Superman vs Chuck Norris thread. If I make a thread this dumb, please, by all means tear into me. I'll take down my post this time, but thats strike one. lol"

Just remember, all newbies have to start somewhere. You should take them and train them. You're always in need of cannon fodder. But if you drive them away, they'll never play for your team.

#16 Posted by zero edge (3696 posts) - - Show Bio

Hey this is a pretty serious thread... Chuck Norris is pretty damn powerful.

#17 Posted by Forever (4332 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck Norris is a joke.

#18 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Forever says:

"Chuck Norris is a joke."

#19 Posted by Ms. Invisible (3292 posts) - - Show Bio

Eternal Chaos says:

"Chuck Norris. If Jesus can walk on water, Chuck can swim on land"

I'm not too sure how swimming on land would be useful, but anyway...

Gambler says:

"Forever says:
"Chuck Norris is a joke."

"

Ha! =D

#20 Posted by Bleu Diamant (27 posts) - - Show Bio

This is easy. Chuck Norris wins. No questions. Here are some reasons why:

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman lives

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds.

There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.

When Chuck Norris was a teenager, he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history.

When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris can actually breath fire.

Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.

Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk.

Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

#21 Posted by G-Man (37025 posts) - - Show Bio

Bleu Diamant says:

"This is easy. Chuck Norris wins. No questions. Here are some reasons why:Chuck Norris can divide by zero.Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman livesChuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds.There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.When Chuck Norris was a teenager, he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history.When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.Chuck Norris can actually breath fire.Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk.Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck NorrisChuck Norris can touch MC Hammer."

Staff
#22 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Bleu Diamant says:

"This is easy. Chuck Norris wins. No questions. Here are some reasons why: Chuck Norris can divide by zero. Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman lives Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill. When Chuck Norris was a teenager, he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history. When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can actually breath fire. Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse. Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk. Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer. "

Thats actually pretty $#@!ing funny. Luv the part about the Miami Dolpins.

#23 Posted by Bleu Diamant (27 posts) - - Show Bio

There were more, but they were pretty inappropriate so I had to edit them out. I forgot this one though:

A street in Los Angeles was named Chuck Norris street, but three days later the name of the street had to be changed after sixteen thousand pedestrians died while crossing it................Nobody crosses Chuck Norris

#24 Posted by Jean_Luc_LeBeau (84704 posts) - - Show Bio

Bleu Diamant says:

"There were more, but they were pretty inappropriate so I had to edit them out. I forgot this one though: A street in Los Angeles was named Chuck Norris street, but three days later the name of the street had to be changed after sixteen thousand pedestrians died while crossing it................Nobody crosses Chuck Norris"

Thats it, I'm changing my vote to Chuck Norris.

#25 Posted by Bleu Diamant (27 posts) - - Show Bio

excellent...

#26 Posted by Hagane Enna (7450 posts) - - Show Bio

Well, yeah, it's Chuck. I mean Chuck Norris' tears could cure cancer but Chuck doesn't cry.

#27 Posted by Valkaad (2589 posts) - - Show Bio

Bleu Diamant says:

"This is easy. Chuck Norris wins. No questions. Here are some reasons why: Chuck Norris can divide by zero. Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman lives Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill. When Chuck Norris was a teenager, he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history. When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can actually breath fire. Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse. Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk. Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer. "

A lot of these are really pretty clever/funny. Chuck Norris has two speeds walk and Kill...classic!

#28 Posted by Valkaad (2589 posts) - - Show Bio

Gambler says:

"Bleu Diamant says:
"This is easy. Chuck Norris wins. No questions. Here are some reasons why: Chuck Norris can divide by zero. Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman lives Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill. When Chuck Norris was a teenager, he once impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the Himalaya mountains. 9 months later, the nuns all gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in NFL history. When the Boogeyman goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can actually breath fire. Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse. Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk. Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to. Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer. "
Thats actually pretty $#@!ing funny. Luv the part about the Miami Dolpins."

Just saw this post. Man i gotta start reading through the whole thread before I comment.

I agree... hilarious.

#29 Posted by Forever (4332 posts) - - Show Bio

Gambler says:

"Bleu Diamant says:
"There were more, but they were pretty inappropriate so I had to edit them out. I forgot this one though: A street in Los Angeles was named Chuck Norris street, but three days later the name of the street had to be changed after sixteen thousand pedestrians died while crossing it................Nobody crosses Chuck Norris"
Thats it, I'm changing my vote to Chuck Norris."

Don't do it. Don't give in to the dark side... oh wait... nevermind.

#30 Posted by Cosmic Sentinel (3749 posts) - - Show Bio

There is no such thing as evolution, just those animal Chuck Norris allows to live.

Online
#31 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

Well, I know a few inapropriate ones, but here's one for Mr. T that isn't so bad.

Mr. T punches foos with brass knuckels because he's afraid of what might happen to them if he punches them with his bare fist.

#32 Posted by Cosmic Sentinel (3749 posts) - - Show Bio

I feel some Walker Texas Ranger clips coming on...

Online
#33 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

I surprised Conan can even pull down that lever.

#34 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

Speaking of Conan

#35 Posted by Logic Mark II (105 posts) - - Show Bio

Bleu Diamant thank you eternally you have brightened up my day, it was raining outside but now its sunny thanks to you...and The Norris of course.

#36 Posted by runk (13 posts) - - Show Bio

when chuck norris does push ups he doesn't push himself up he pushes the world down.

#37 Posted by Bulky Bicep (26 posts) - - Show Bio

there is no chin under chuck's beard. just another fist.

#38 Posted by Eternal Chaos (22990 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck's unstoppable.

#39 Posted by G-Man (37025 posts) - - Show Bio

Take your pick:

Or

Staff
#40 Posted by Octagon Freak (11158 posts) - - Show Bio

G-Man says:

"Take your pick: Or "

Muahahaha!!!!

#41 Posted by Phorqe (2109 posts) - - Show Bio

There is no such thing as the Endangered Species list. There is just a list of creatures Chuck Norris let's live.

#42 Posted by Smog (18 posts) - - Show Bio

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, too bad hes never cried. ever.

#43 Posted by GabrielCosma (15 posts) - - Show Bio

Fake and Gay

#44 Posted by clemj (817 posts) - - Show Bio

for it to be a good thread I must mention this : 
"once upon a time , superman and chuck norris fought after a bet, the one who'll lose will have to wear underpants till the end of his life... "
well you got your answer

#45 Posted by Petey_is_Spidey (2868 posts) - - Show Bio

What is Chuck Norris gonna do? Slap him with his beard?

#46 Posted by blackadamFTW (7867 posts) - - Show Bio

@GabrielCosma said:

Fake and Gay

Wow, you bumped a stupid thread with a stupid comment like that.

#47 Posted by Z3RO180 (6633 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck dousnt need to fight to cause he never loses.

#48 Posted by KalTheHokage_2007 (651 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck doesn't win. he allows his enemies to lose. Saying he won implies effort was involved.

#49 Posted by jeanroygrant (20191 posts) - - Show Bio

@Eternal Chaos said:

Chuck Norris. If Jesus can walk on water, Chuck can swim on land

#50 Posted by nerbs (1 posts) - - Show Bio

Chuck sneezed, Krypton blew up. Nuff said...