Statement of the obvious: Comics are flammable. Extremely flammable. I shouldn't have to tell you that, but to start this piece off, it's needed information. Recently, in Kenosha Wisconsin, a comic store caught on fire. The Kenosha News reported that the owner of the Heroes and Dreams store discovered smoke coming from his store at 9:50 A.M. Monday and reported it to the local authorities.
When the fire department arrived, they found numerous fires on the first floor and basement of the building. There was little damage, but many of the comics were damaged due to smoke and soot. At this time, the fire department suspects arson. Let's say this wasn't arson though because I wouldn't doubt it if it was. Let's say you were stuck in your house, and you smell smoke. You follow all the proper precautions you learned from Fireman Ted down the street and you know you have to jump out the window. Bare with me here... Now, you obviously have time to search through your comics and pick out TWO comics from your collection. Why two? Because I'm tired of three or five. Plus, the fire is really raging. What two comics do you save from the inferno? No trades or collections, only single issue comic books! Also, if you try and save more than two, you burn alive.
== TEASER ==
First one I'd save is the first comic that was ever given to me. It was an insert into the Chicago Tribune back in the early 80s. Spider-Man and The Hulk. I have no clue what happens in this book because It was bagged and boarded years ago, and I haven't read in it about a decade, but I'm sure the two fought each other and then realized they were both the good guy, and then they possibly hugged. Anyway, this book means a lot to me, has a lot of sentimental value, and this would be the first book I would save.
The second book I'd grab has no real monetary nor sentimental value to it. I'd save this book purely for my interview with the local newscaster. The book is one of my favorite covers: Fantastic Four 292, with Hitler on the cover and the team debating whether or not to kill him. Again, this would be one classic interview with a reporter. "Sir, you survived the fire, and you've seemingly lost everything except for this comic... with Hitler on it?"
"Yes, throughout the confusion, the smoke, and the mass amounts of things I've collected, I managed to grab the one comic that makes me smile... The one with Hitler on the cover." I could win a newscaster a local emmy with a speech like that.
So what about you guys? What two comics would you grab? Remember, if you grab more than two, you'll burn alive.
~Mat "InferiorEgo" Elfring is a comedian, teacher, comic store employee, and comic book writer.~
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