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The 5: Xtreme Comic Covers!

Two tickets to the gun show! (Non-Refundable)

 

Many of us avid reads have fond FOND memories of the 80s and 90s. In films, Arnie was blowing something up and then saying something profound like, "See you later, Alligator." On television, the Dan Cortese was back flipping over things. People started dropping letters off of words that began with vowels. Chester Cheetah was murdering innocent children for their Air Jordan's. This was normal... to me. Comics quickly followed suit, especially in the cover department. I haven't done this in a while (The 5) because there was something gnawing at the base of my spine telling me that I can't do another one until I discuss the most important comic cover theme: X-tremism. I will go over 5 wonderfully X-treme comic covers. Enjoy... That's a demand.
 

 Oh no he didn't!

What's X-Treme: 
First we have Aquaman, which is pretty X-treme on his own. Take a closer look. He's a super-hero who's costume is all ripped up, obviously because he's been laying the smackdown on some low life scum. X-TREME! Rad... Next, he's fighting his arch-nemesis Black Manta and trying to drown him. Also X-Treme! He also has BIG BOLD LETTERING declaring he's going to kill Black Manta. Pre-meditated murder! X-Treme!    
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Look at that dude's face. He's totally crying! Big baby! You're man enough to be a hero and kick some butt, but you can't do it without laying down a few tears? NOT X-TREME! 
 

Final Verdict:  
This cover is pretty tubular, but the whole crying thing is totally not rad.
Score: Drinking Mountain Dew on the couch.
 
 

 Oh no you didn't!

What's X-Treme:
Duh! Adam-X the Xtreme is on the cover! That's two "X"s in his name. Not only that, but he's in a X-Force book. Three "X"s? You're blowing my mind! He's also got on a backwards baseball hat, goatee, and long hair! He's like Axl Rose in that one music video! X-Treme! He's got blades everywhere! And the one in his hand, covered in blood (awesome), looks like he took from Shatterstar, who Adam-X totally beat up! X-Treme! "Things have never been deadlier!" Totally true!
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme:
I actually own this book, and I bought it because of the cover. That's what I get for being 12 years old.
 
Final Verdict:
This is quite possibly one of the most X-Treme covers ever. All it needs is another X on the cover.
Score: Back-flip into the swimming pool. 

 
 
 Oh no he won't!
What's X-Treme:
Villain on the cover has a gun made out of his hand, and he's deformed. Gross.... But gross equals X-Treme! Fighting ni the rain is always X-Treme. The title of the story arc is "Humanity's Fathom." I have no clue what that means, but it sounds smart... X-Treme! Wait... Does Daredevil have body armor on? Oh man..... dude.... Most excellent and X-Treme. Plus it's black. And we all know black costumes are X-Treme.
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme:
Daredevil is out in the open and the bad guy is hiding? What is this? Role reversal day? Opposite day? Not cool...
 
Final Verdict:
You'd think Daredevil out in the open like that would lower the score, but it totally doesn't. Why? Because he's stalking, in the rain! The rain makes all the difference. 
Score: Eating Doritos while Skydiving.
 
 
 
 Oh no!
What's X-Treme:
I know what you're thinking, "Why is this here? This isn't X-Treme!" You'd be wrong. This comic invented X-Treme! This is the godfather of X-Treme. Dean Martin is totally not drinking alcohol on the cover of this book. X-Treme! And because of this, he's totally scoring with two fine ladies. Also X-Treme! Now take a look at Jerry Lewis. He has his head in the mouth of a very confused alligator. X-Treme! And he thinks it's some sort of bag! AWESOME! Lastly, Jerry Lewis just escaped from prison! You can only get an outfit like that if you do hard time!
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
The fact I had to tell you how X-Treme this is totally lowers the score.
 
Final Verdict:
Your grandpappy may have been influenced to cut a rug to some big band music because of this book, but it won't affect you that way. 
Score: Kissing a woman at a rave... AND drinking Mountain Dew.
 
 

 Oh snap!
What's X-treme:
Easy question, easier answer. First, the dude is TOTALLY punching the crap out of the title of the book. Take that corporations! X-Treme! This guy has muscles on top of more muscles on top of more muscles. X-Treme! He's got body armor on, which discussed earlier with Daredevil. X-Treme! He's got a skull painted on his blackish-blue armor to scare everyone away because he's so cool. X-Treme!  Dude... It's called X-Treme X-Men... DOUBLE X-TREME!
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme:
Barcodes. Pffft. 
 
Final Verdict:
I dare you to find a more X-Treme cover. I really do. If you can, I'll internet high-five you.
 Score: Winning Silver at the X Games and being sponsored by Slim Jim.
 
 
 
 
 
 
Honorable Mention: Every Wolverine Cover Ever

Yes, I have lost it.
44 Comments
Posted by Lady Tlieso

Where are all the silver-holo-foil-embossed covers? Those are pretty X-Treme too. lol
Nice article IE.

Posted by inferiorego
@Lady Tlieso: I covered that in "The 5: Comic Cover Trends"
Staff
Posted by danhimself

MOUNTAIN DEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Online
Posted by inferiorego
Staff
Posted by Chane

That aquaman one was one of the first aquaman books I read.

Posted by Vortex13

How could you not have mentioned on the last one that it was an x-treme x-men issue?!?!

Posted by inferiorego
@Vortex13 said:
" How could you not have mentioned on the last one that it was an x-treme x-men issue?!?! "
i knew i forgot something... thanks
Staff
Posted by Vortex13
@inferiorego said:
" @Vortex13 said:
" How could you not have mentioned on the last one that it was an x-treme x-men issue?!?! "
i knew i forgot something... thanks "
lol, no problem.
Posted by sora_thekey

Ok Let me try it! 
Here's one I found: 
 

 
What's X-Treme: 
The word Blood is on the cover and you said yourself that's X-Treme.  Death is also on the cover, so X-Treme. The background has a spider bleeding, so that's also X-Treme. Peter parker is lying there dead and MJ crying for him,so that's double X-Treme.
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
The fact that we don't know from the coveer why Peter is dying. (Unless you read the past issue) 
 
Final Verdict: 
The lack of information lowers the score but you have to admit that huge bleeding spider looks cool! 
Score: Carnival Rides without Security Measures
    
 
Great (and strange) article by the way!
Moderator
Posted by Emperor Gonzo Noir

Posted by inferiorego
@sora_thekey: NICE!
Staff
Posted by xerox_kitty

I still like that era of X-Force.  It makes me feel nostalgic for a time when I loved Tony Daniels' ridiculously large muscles, boobs & bums... Oh, and hair.  Can't forget the long 90's hair.

Moderator
Posted by Meteorite

Best article I've read for ages!

Edited by CATMANEXE
@inferiorego said:

I dare you to find a more X-Treme cover. I really do. If you can, I'll internet high-five you.

I'll have to give it a shot, i have a fetish for internet high fives. ill let you be the judge.

   
 points of xtremeness to watch out for (dont burn your eyes!)

the word (?) "Xtreme " in the title, phrase " Totally Tough Can You Handle It? "( no my sirs and mams, im afraid you cannot!)
and " TOUGH! ", not just prizes but awesome gifts, an American Gladiator all big and xtreme and hes named Wolf and
he's " badder than ever ", doesnt have a background as it doesnt need one cramping its xtreme-factor, Sonic The Hedgehog,
Spider-Man, the Star Wars font, Darth Vaders mask, Spyro The Dragon, video games, music player, xtreme sports
enthusiasts doing ninja stuff, cheat codes, barfin puzzles, jokes, game, comix (with an X), puzzles, telly, the sound
FWARP, and Things You MUST Do In 2009 (were you perchance xtreme enough to have?)

losses = bar code, a piece of wood, and no Bruce Lee

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dandy
Posted by geraldthesloth

 
  
 
 
I've found these two covers WAY MORE X-TREEEEEEEEEEEEME than yours :P
 
also just for fun.





Posted by inferiorego
@geraldthesloth: That cover of ASM is amazing.
Staff
Posted by geraldthesloth
@inferiorego: Those are really good Doritos..:)
Posted by Vortex13
@inferiorego said:
" @sora_thekey: NICE!
"
I can beat that,
 

BOOM!

Posted by inferiorego
@CATMANEXE: holy xtreme!
Staff
Posted by sora_thekey
@inferiorego said:
" @geraldthesloth: That cover of ASM is amazing. "

Actually that ASM cover was one before the one I did! 
I was torn between doing one or the other... but I liked the bleeding spider 
 
You know I did a Blog similar to what you do on the 5... only I did it on CB Events logos... Check it out!
Moderator
Posted by brythorion12

OH NOO!!!

Posted by inferiorego
@sora_thekey: I couldn't find the "like" button.
Staff
Posted by geraldthesloth
@Vortex13 said:
" @inferiorego said:
" @sora_thekey: NICE!
"
I can beat that,
 

BOOM!

"
I see that and I raise you!
 
BAM!
 
Posted by Vortex13
@geraldthesloth: Yeah but those don't exist anymore, If they did you would have won on x-tremeness.
Posted by geraldthesloth
@Vortex13: I haven't seen Fiery Habanero flavored doritos in months..
Posted by Vortex13
@geraldthesloth: Well that picture I posted was one I took right before I uploaded it, soooooooooooooooo...... I WIN!!!! lol I just got that bag a couple of days ago and they are yummy, hey do I get x-treme points for taking picture of a dangerous food item in my own home? lol
Posted by geraldthesloth
@Vortex13: Dangerously...zesty lol
Posted by Meteorite
And now, Meteorite shall present the story arc with the most extreme covers: Fall From Grace (which I highly recommend everyone reading)
What's X-Treme: 

A red figure is falling from the building! Is Daredevil committing suicide? Hell no, but it sure looks that way! Also, the cover is in a black and white style, making it look noir-ish. And everyone knows that noir is Xtreme.
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Big white spaces just mean the cover artist was too lazy to draw in a background.  
 
Final Verdict: Xtreme, but could be more Xtreme.

Score: Getting a papercut whilst reading and not putting a bandaid on it.
 
 
  What's X-Treme: 

Silver Sable is holding up a ruined Daredevil costume with her gun, which is much more Xtreme then holding it up with your hands! And the expression on her face makes her look like she doesn't care that she killed Daredevil!  (Probably because she didn't)
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Again, lack of background. For all we know Silver Sable is at the entrance to a portal of some kind of light dimension, which opens to a dimension where everything is black.

Final Verdict:  Add a background and it'll be much more Xtreme.
  
Score: Trying to walk along a white line whilst drunk
   
What's X-Treme: 

Some demonic beast is hanging around, and is giving Daredevil a piggyback ride! Only Xtreme people dare to do such things to demonic beings from hell! 
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
The lines radiating from Daredevil's head are supposed to represent his radar sense, but just makes it looks as if someone has been throwing a big reel of nylon cord around.

Final Verdict:  Take away the lines, and add some colour and then you might have a more Xtreme cover.
 
Score: Stubbing your toe whilst barefooted
 
What's X-Treme: A giant face with a red eye is grinning at the reader. 'Nuff said.

 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: Daredevil is... coming out of Siege's eyesocket? And changing colours as he does so? Not cool. (And in a Count of Monte Cristo-esque twist, the covers have gone back to not having a background after one which had a background)

Final Verdict:  Take Daredevil out of this cover and you have a cover that's not just Xtreme, but is also scary.
 
Score: Eating Doritos whilst playing archery
 
  What's X-Treme: 
Venom would get one thousand Xtreme points even if he didn't do a thing. But he appears to be eating Matt Murdock. XTREME!

 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Does Matt's neck have stretching capabilities? Because I don't see his body anywhere. Also, you don't need to tell us that it guest-stars Venom. We can tell from the cover!

Final Verdict:  As said above, Venom gets a thousand Xtreme points regardless. Plus since he's eating the title star, that's another five thousand. So overall, it's worth six thousand Xtreme points.

Score: Playing archery blindfolded whilst your friends are running in front of the targets. And they're eating Doritos.
 
  What's X-Treme: 

  Morbius is getting really PO'd. Look at him! Who else wouldn't be annoyed at Daredevil pretending to be a shadow?
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Judging by the background, Morbius and DD aren't in the normal space/time continuum, since theres absolutely nothing around them except a floating barcode and a group of letters.

Final Verdict: 
  White background! Bah!

Score: Riding a bike up a steep hill then going down as fast as possible
 
 

What's X-Treme: 
Blood, a sharp object, and DD's armoured costume! That's three Xtreme things on one cover, kids! (And there's an attempt at a background! Huzzah!) 
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
The barcode spoils the dark feel of the cover a bit.

Final Verdict:  
 More Xtreme than jumping out of a plane without a parachute!

Score: Jumping out of a plane with a backpack full of Doritos
 .
  
(On a side note, I highly recommend this story arc to anyone who likes Daredevil or Elektra. It's really good)
Posted by CATMANEXE
@Meteorite: 
not the best, not quite Man Without Fear.  


anywho, the winner of those is clearly #321. the reason for that is the facts you left out.
for one, the main opponent in the series graces the cover. he's Hellspawn, Daredevils
more buck that Daredevil and very evil counterpart created in Infinity War and deserted on
Earth like his brethren, Doppleganger who was better known for Maximum Carnage.
but the bigger reason its that EXTREME! is that color loss you discredited it for...
was because that cover glows in the dark.
Posted by Meteorite
@CATMANEXE :
I would have mentioned the glow in the dark business if I'd realised, but I read the Fall from Grace story arc through a TPB which I picked up from a library.
Posted by inferiorego

Glowing in the dark is totally X-Treme! 
I love how many pictures of doritos bags ended up in her.... 
 
 
p.s. do the dew

Staff
Posted by EisforExtinction

 

What's X-Treme: 
The main character of the comic (who has a vendetta against Anamorphic Animals) buries characters in shallow graves and the warning in the corner explains that this scene doesn't occur in the comic.
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Most of these characters are still alive. I believe in the actual issue he kills them all.

Final Verdict:  
 X-Treme like a tribal tattoo.
Posted by Sickness


 Ghost Rider 2099 #14

What's X-Treme: 
First we have Ghost Rider 2099, thats rad by itself....But he's riding a motorcycle! X-TREME!!!  Plus his motorcycle has an american flag on it! AMERICA! F@CK YEAH! Thats x-treme, but instead of stars, you've got Doom's face! That must mean Doom of the FUTURE must be in control of AMERICA!!! X-treme!
 Holy crap, did we mention he's A ROBOT GHOST RIDER!!!? Thats awesome.
 
What's Totally Not X-Treme: 
Again, Barcode.

Final Verdict:  
This cover is groovy pie. 
 
Score: Drinking Mountain Dew ontop of an American Flag with Freebird playing in the background
 


Posted by CATMANEXE

ive been browsing , and ran into this. i do not need to explain what is Xtreme about this cover,
because thats how Xtreme it is. im currently looking into ordering the glory just so i can breath
the cover into my eyeballs in a daily dose.

Posted by inferiorego
@CATMANEXE: That book is actually based on one of my favorite bands: Electric Frankenstein.
Staff
Posted by AirDave817

I can only think of one cover that screams to be X-treme!

 
Posted by Vortex13
@inferiorego said:
" @CATMANEXE: That book is actually based on one of my favorite bands: Electric Frankenstein. "
I love the song "coolest little monster" but that is literally the only one of theirs I've heard lol.
Posted by Red L.A.M.P.
@inferiorego:  
 
Haha, love this post, love this line..

 First, the dude is TOTALLY punching the crap out of the title of the book. Take that corporations! X-Treme!  

Staff
Posted by drawme

X-Treme!
Good article.

Posted by inferiorego
@AirDave817 said:
" I can only think of one cover that screams to be X-treme!

"
Where's the one where Punisher is trying to kill a guy that looks exactly like Archie?
Staff
Posted by CATMANEXE
@AirDave817: sorry, thumbs down. while i love that book....
 
Xtreme= Punisher, a big gun, and Giant 48 Pages 
 
anti-Xtreme= vivid colors, sock hops, balloons, bar codes, CCA stamps, chaperones, cool Punisher skull turned into goofy Archie face,
cavegirl/Josie And The Pussycats house band with pink guitars, anything and everyone that exists in Riverdale.
 
Archie himself is saying it best there= " This is ridiculous! "
Edited by Argentino_18

This is X-treme!!!!!! 

They are f*cking drenched in Blood!!!!! 
All of them with Stealth Suit and bladed or perforing weapons----- 
 
 
 
 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX-TREME!!!!
Posted by Illyana Rasputin
@inferiorego said:
" @AirDave817 said:
" I can only think of one cover that screams to be X-treme!

 
"
Where's the one where Punisher is trying to kill a guy that looks exactly like Archie? "

Is this for real?
Posted by Illyana Rasputin
 
The Pro is X-Treme!