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336 Comments

Off My Mind: Did Batman Really Wet His Pants?

According to Kevin Smith he did.


Batman is the world's greatest detective and the master of many things. Although apparently he is not the master of his own bladder. 
 
In Kevin Smith's Batman: The Widening Gyre #6, Batman tries to make the point that no one is an expert at first. It turns out that Batman claims he actually peed in his pants one time.  Are we supposed to actually accept this? 
 
I really like Kevin Smith. I have to admit that there's been something off about the Widening Gyre. There's been something that's made it hard for me to want to keep up with the series. And then this issue came out. I get that Batman is trying to boost someone's confidence by explaining how he wasn't the badass he is today in the beginning. He briefly struggled with the decision to share this bit of information. Batman was trying to do the right thing, but can the Batman fans actually accept that he pissed himself
 == TEASER == 
Let's see that image again:
What makes this more interesting is that DC allowed this little exchange to happen. Sure there's the possibility that Batman just made up this story but that doesn't seem likely. There's no mention of that later in the comic. Basically, DC has allowed Kevin Smith to knock Batman down a peg by having him wet himself. This story is, as far as I know, not an Elseworlds book. I'm not sure what's worse, that someone said, "Let's have Batman pee in his pants" or the fact that someone at DC said, "Yeah, let's do that." 
 
Does this change the way you think of Batman? Batman: Year One showed us that Batman wasn't an expert from the beginning but having him wet his pants in another thing. Does this change the way you feel about Kevin Smith's writing? Can you still look at Batman and not think about him actually peeing on himself? Does Batman now wear bat-diapers to ensure this doesn't happen again?
336 Comments
Posted by Bathory1313

NO NO NO NO.. can't accept this sorry ...

Posted by NXH

WTF?!

Posted by Fobzilla

yeah, this is kind of F'd up. This image will be stuck in my head when i go back and read year one again.

Edited by xscarletkittie

I really don't see what the big deal is. There are a lot of instances in comics where a character is portrayed a certain way/information given about them that get swept under the rug and never mentioned again. This will just be one of them.

Posted by iLLituracy

LMAO.

Posted by ComicMan24

It doesn't change how I feel about Batman but I'm afraid it will haunt him forever. But about this story, is it canon or not?

Posted by SmoothJammin

skeletons in the closest. or in this case, batcave.
Posted by MisterDK

From his Twitter Kevin Smith had this to say:
 
  Via @ lastgeek "Why did you make Batman piss himself?" Batman SAY he pissed himself? I think you read too much into the joke Baphomet made. 
 
  Via @ Irregularcog "You wrote it like it was 'You're saying you WET YOUR PANTS?!'" But it's the OTHER guy saying it, not Bats. Difference. 
 
  Via @ Irregularcog "Gyre #6. Batman pissing his pants in scene from Year One? Why?" He didn't; he said he had a bladder spasm. Difference. 
 
And while this isn't on him wetting himself it's still interesting:
 
  Via @ denmark116 "How long do we wait for volume 2?" GYRE Vol. 2 starts up after the first of the year. And it's a MUCH more familiar Bats...

Posted by couzinit99

This just shows how horribly crappy Kevin Smith is as a writer. Between making Batman Pee his pants and making Joker strongly femenine in his first Batman miniseries, Kevin really doesn't get how to write characters. Its pathetic almost to see how lame his writing is considering i've liked his movies for the most part.  I think him and a few other should definetly stay clear of writing comics, because they don't understand how to write characters.
Edited by Lokheit

I can see how from now, any battle thread with batman will have a recurring argument against him from the opposition...

Posted by Silver2467
@Bathory1313 said:
" NO NO NO NO.. can't accept this sorry ... "
Posted by AmazingSpiderMike

Eh, Bats was just exaggerating for effect and to sympathize with the other character. It actually shows a more human side to Batman rather than the well-known Super-hero type. By saying that he "wet himself", it shouldn't be taken seriously, but was just say that he at one time was really scared to do the things he does today. When Bruce Wayne first became The Batman I think everyone assumed that he would be scared to do certain things like swing on the batline or fight the Joker. Now that he has been Batman for about a hundred years (exaggeration) he has pretty much gotten used to being The Batman and has more or less adjusted his"bladder" sorta speak........
 
But if he really did "wet himself", I wonder what Babs reaction would be? lol.

Posted by Fireheart10
@Silver2467 said:
" @Bathory1313 said:
" NO NO NO NO.. can't accept this sorry ... "
"
I have the feeling we will see this in the battle threads.
Posted by Silver2467
@Fireheart10 said:
" @Silver2467 said:
" @Bathory1313 said:
" NO NO NO NO.. can't accept this sorry ... "
"
I have the feeling we will see this in the battle threads. "
That's what I am afraid of. 
Posted by MisterDK
@couzinit99 said:
"...and making Joker strongly femenine in his first Batman miniseries, Kevin really doesn't get how to write characters. "
You say that but I could see the Joker doing this quite easily.

Posted by iLLituracy
@couzinit99 said:
" This just shows how horribly crappy Kevin Smith is as a writer. Between making Batman Pee his pants and making Joker strongly femenine in his first Batman miniseries, Kevin really doesn't get how to write characters. Its pathetic almost to see how lame his writing is considering i've liked his movies for the most part.  I think him and a few other should definetly stay clear of writing comics, because they don't understand how to write characters. "
I disagree.
Posted by Telcalipoca
@Silver2467 said:
" @Bathory1313 said:
" NO NO NO NO.. can't accept this sorry ... "
"
Posted by LoggerRythm

This reminds me of when Marvel screwed one of the most awesome story lines ever in X-Men history with New X-Men. If you haven't read that series run I'm not gonna ruin it here, however Marvel later pissed all over that story arc (Like the tie in?) later with crap that didn't make any sense and everyone called them on crap storytelling.  
I still refuse to acknowledge their tie off as actual X-Men cannon.  
As far as I'm concerned a certain two people at the end of that story are still dead and that particular one person they have in the x-books now is a clone and that other person they made as an actual character never truly existed. If they want to screw up continuity then I can too damn it!
If you haven't read the first volume of New X-Men pick up the Tpb or the hardcover, it's totally worth it, trust me. 
Now as for Batman, I get that Kevin was trying to make him appear as being more human than most heroes however still making him admit that he pissed himself is way too funny and kinda kills the bad-assness (is that a word?) that Batman usually gives off. So in that respect I can understand why people have a problem with that.

Posted by NightFang
@iLLituracy said:
" LMAO. "
             More like a LMFAO!
Posted by AirDave817

I don't blame "bad writing". I blame bad editing. I don't care if it's Kevin Smith, Alan Moore, James Robinson, Kurt Busiek, Marv Wolfman - whoever it is. That's what an editor is for, isn't it? To catch stuff. Not to just rubber stamp it....Now this has got me wondering what kind of other stuff got tweaked or edited out, if this was left in. 
 
Kinda like how Alan Moore was shocked that DC actually let him cripple Barbara Gordon. On Earth-D (for Earth-Dave) that is an Elseworlds story. Hey, if DC is going to bring the Multiverse back so that everybody is happy - I get MY OWN WORLD where things go my way!     

Edited by antiterra

That last issue of The Widening Gyre is one screw-up after another, right up to the final page, which is frankly painful in its predictability. If only the bladder thing was the only stupid and incoherent thing in the book.

If. Only.

I'd go over it, but someone else has already made a great job of listing the many reasons why Kevin Smith should be banned for ever writing another Batman comic: http://www.comicsalliance.com/2010/07/29/worst-of-the-worst-batman-the-widening-gyre-6/

If written correctly, almost no idea is off-limits or too weird, but poor characterisation ("hello, dude-whom-I've-known-for-all-of-5-seconds, here's the Batcave, and I'm actually Bruce Wayne! Oh, and here's my future wife, in case you want to tell a few super-villains!") and lazy storytelling (shock! twist ending! ZOMG!! *yawn*) are unforgivable.

I don't personally consider TWG as canon, not because I "refuse" to see my precious Batman taken down a notch (something that good - emphasis on *good* - writers have done many, many times), but because whoever Kevin Smith's character is, it's just some dude dressed up as Batman who acts in ways that Bruce Wayne never would.

Posted by dondasch

Congratulations, Kevin.  You've successfully insulted an icon AND managed to get that little line into continuity.  Well done.  Now can you toddle off and go smoke more weed with your friend Jay ?

Posted by Joey Ravn
@iLLituracy said:
I disagree. 
 
Ah, yes. A strong counter-argument indeed. Anyway, I wouldn't he SUCKS as a comic book writer, though he's not terribly good either. The Widening Gyre had its moments, especially at the end of #05, but... Between the delays and the ending of Volume 1 with the "big revelation" of #06... it felt lackluster. IMO, that ending substracts from BOTH characters (if you've read it you'll know who I'm talking about).  Also, the idea of Batman unmasking just like that to someone he barely knows is... far-fetched, at least.
 
It doesn't matter, though. This has been confirmed not to be canonical by both DC and Kevin Smith himself:  http://www.newsarama.com/comics/sdcc-2010-batman-widening-gyre-100722.html 
 
(See paragraph at 12:45)
Posted by They Killed Cap!

This is Stupid.

Posted by Dracade102


 
Posted by dvorak

There's a reason Kevin Smith constantly admits that he's really terrible at everything he does. Someone must think he's joking, because they keep throwing money at him.

Posted by carnivalofsins00

as far as im concerned, The Widening Gyre doesnt exist to me.

Posted by Fireheart10
@Dracade102 said:
"

"
LOL
Edited by Decept-O
@dondasch:
Very well said, very well said indeed.     
 
Batman pissing himself, though, that is a suspension of disbelief I just can't accept.  Then again, it all "depends" on your level of suspension!!  *pun intended*   
Posted by kungnima

 Hell No.

Posted by Storm Rider

I love the early Kevin Smith films. Just about everything right up until after Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was pretty good (Clerks and Dogma were freakin' great). However, I have never enjoyed any comics he's written. Between odd characterizations and bouts of severe lateness, I'd say with pretty good certainty that if it wasn't for his name value he wouldn't be getting too many writing gigs.

Posted by kareem

I don't know the context of this scan but the way he tells the story it sounds like the "incident" happened near the beginning of his career, and if so than I  think what he said is fine. No matter what trauma you have been through you don't just suddenly become the tough as nails Batman that we all know, so it is very possible that if he accidentally made an explosion bigger than intended that he would loose control of his bladder for a second, especially if under-experienced.

Posted by SupremoMaximo

He wears "Ooops I Crapped My Pants"

Posted by sythspawn

What?!

Posted by saiyan_earthling

What the "BEEP"?!

Posted by Booly

Oh how the mighty have fallen. Kevin Smith wrote a few funny movies. Then he wrote like 10 more that sucked on par with M Night  Shyamalan.   
 
Kevin Smith wrote a good Dare Devil run. And the rest so far. Suck on par with.... Well there is no other comic writer that sucks as bad as Kevin Smith. 
 
He ALWAYS has to inflict his personal sense of reality into his comics. The Black Cat was date raped and that is why she became the Black Cat. The Joker wants to have anal sex, Batman wets himself and beats up his girlfriend after giving her 11 orgasms?  Kevin Smith clearly has problems. I'm sure he is only shadowed by Caligula at his sex anonymous meetings.  I hope he reads these comments.  KEVIN YOU SUCK you degenerate pervert. 

Posted by CaptainUseless
@xscarletkittie said:
" I really don't see what the big deal is. There are a lot of instances in comics where a character is portrayed a certain way/information given about them that get swept under the rug and never mentioned again. This will just be one of them. "
Posted by danhimself

wow you guys are really making a big deal out of nothing....honestly who cares?   it's a mini series that has no ties to regular continuity....if you read it and like it then good for you, if you read it and hate then good for you, if you didn't read it (like me) then good for you
 
I honestly hate when people piss all over a writer's work...he or she is the one writing the book...not you...if you don't like it then do something about it....start submitting your work to the comic book companies, get big, then write a mini that changes the continuity of whatever you dislike....that's the only way you're going to change anything

Posted by Shadow_Thief

I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, it does reiterate Batman's essential humanity, which I feel is a huge part of his enduring popularity as a character. As Seanbaby once said, "It didn't matter if Superman forgot about his cape and got pulled through a garbage disposal. On a good day he'd save us all, and on a bad day he was still invincible." Batman doesn't have things this easy; beneath all his gadgetry, skills, and general badassery, he's just as squishable as you or me. He didn't just wake up one day and say "Ok, I'm Batman now," and presto, become the character he is today. He had to learn to overcome the natural fears and insecurities that anyone would feel in a life-threatening situation, no matter how well you prepared for it, and I think occasional glimpses of the man beneath the bat only make it easier to relate to him. 
 
Now, that being said, I think this particular incident was atrociously handled. It took what could have been a very personal look into Batman's essential humanity (something that could have added even more depth to his character) and basically ruined it, turning it into more of an inappropriate gag than anything else. I'd liken it to the revelation of Rogue's fling with Sentry: handled properly, it could have been a powerful and defining moment for a character. Handled improperly, well...just go read it and you'll see how that turns out.

Posted by Fire-brand

hey you screw up your pyrotechnics when standing over them, you'll pee a bit too.

Posted by SpidermanWins

?

Posted by Eisenheim

It is physically impossible to pee your pants

Posted by longbowhunter

Widening Gyre #6 was one of my favorite books last week. Every writer is going to bring a little of himself to the character, thats just a fact. Even a true blue dyed in the wool Batman fan like myself finds it totally believable for Batman to piss himself. I just couldnt believe he told anybody.
Posted by antiterra
@Shadow_Thief said:
 I'd liken it to the revelation of Rogue's fling with Sentry: handled properly, it could have been a powerful and defining moment for a character. Handled improperly, well...just go read it and you'll see how that turns out. "

That's a perfect analogy, and I couldn't agree more with your point overall. Good writing can make you accept almost anything - but good writing this was most definitely not.
Posted by MisterMollusk

*Gasp! I bet next they'll say Batman get's scared when he's being shot at! 

Posted by umbrafeline

batman: i uhh... had a bladder spasm 
 
other guy: no you didnt. you peed your pants 
 
lol
Posted by d0npierre

Kevin Smith's Earth. Full of canon. Full of b*ll****. 
 
Earth-KS or Earth-BS...

Posted by Quintus_Knightfall
Noooooo, cant be.....you mean the fat dude from such sophisticated comedy epics like "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" turned Batman into a pee pee joke? I dont believe it (sarcasm)
Moderator Online
Posted by CedricAckeyi

Really? Why does anyone care about this? To be fair, If we were Batman for a day, we'd crap our pants at the stuff he does on regular basis; Pray to god, it isn't the day he's on the Justice league or you would scared out of your mind. Plus, this is one of Batman's first adventures so its clear to see that he was still a novice back then.

Posted by elayem98

In Year one it says none of you ARE safe(correct) 
And in Gyre it says none of you IS safe. 
hahahaha really?